tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53596680316162726632024-03-13T22:09:17.210-07:00Rowan's StoryOur son Rowan left this world December 15th, 2016 at the age of ten years old. In those 10 years, he spent a third of his life in the hospital including his last 6 months, as he went through 2 bone marrow transplants in a row. He taught us so many lessons through his life long battle though. He was tough as nails, with a heart of gold, and the faith of 100 men combined. Not a day went by that he didn't say "I love my life!" And he truly meant it.Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.comBlogger356125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-66347077328337672172019-08-18T19:30:00.000-07:002019-08-18T19:30:16.416-07:00Turns out I CAN go back to the zoo...<div style="text-align: center;">
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Today was the first time that I have been back to the San Antonio Zoo in 3 years, my first time without Rowan. I'm not sure I would have ever gone back, except for Lily. Lily is my adorable God-daughter. She had her Daddy buy me a zoo pass for my birthday last month. Today I met her, her Mommy and Daddy, and her brother Jake there. I was really nervous that it would be too much for me emotionally. Rowan loved the zoo so much. It was one of his favorite places. I wore my necklace with his picture on it, but I should have know that he would show me he was there with me in other ways too... I should have known.</div>
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As soon as I walked through the gate and had my pass scanned, a blue dragonfly buzzed past me and landed on the fence. You might have to zoom in, but you should be able to see it on the middle post here.</div>
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I had so much fun watching Lily and Jake run from exhibit to exhibit. </div>
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Jake promised to protect me from snakes, and he wanted to lead the way. Lily held my hand as we walked. </div>
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The hippos were Rowan's favorite, so I especially enjoyed sharing them with Lily and Jake.</div>
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When the kids went into the petting zoo area, to brush the goats and pigs, I stayed back and sat on a bench. I wanted a moment to take it all in. As I sat there reminiscing about all the times I had taken Rowan to the zoo, I suddenly noticed something...</div>
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...yep, someone was holding their child's "green frog" wubby…just like the one Rowan had for ten years (don't worry, we cut the pacifier off after the first couple years). If you ever cared for Rowan in the hospital, any hospital, then you knew "green frog". Rowan was buried with "Green Frog Jr." and I still have his original "Green Frog" with me. It brought tears to my eyes instantly. I knew it was another sign that Rowan was with me.</div>
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Thank you Lily and Jake. Lily for holding my hand. Jake for leading the way and protecting me. And thank you Kristi & James for my zoo pass. Turns out I CAN go back to the zoo...and I look forward to doing so with y'all again soon.</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-44610290630870828522019-06-22T09:29:00.001-07:002019-06-22T09:29:13.265-07:00"Dragonflies and lemonade..."<div style="text-align: center;">
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Let me start by saying that Rowan had a lot of special things in his life... many things that are so very difficult to part with, because they hold such dear memories. I can't just bring myself to donate the entirety of his room to Goodwill, or to hold a random garage sale...it just doesn't feel right. I feel better about gifting items of his, as I feel led to, to either people who need the specific items, or to his special friends. Christa received one of his favorite stuffed hippos, a painting she had made him and a couple other items, Khale received his medical chair/stroller, Sam got his bongos and his Minecraft book, Roman received his bike and helmet, etc. </div>
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About 2 months ago, we needed to get a new fridge. As I helped wheel the old one out to the garage, to await delivery of the new one, the men placed it in the corner of the garage. It just so happened to be placed next to Rowan's lemonade stand...the one he and his siblings used to raise tens of thousands of dollars for Kidd's Kids over several years, prior to Rowan's death. As I glanced up at it, my eyes filled with tears. I ran my hand over the painted yellow and white wood, and I instantly pictured little Rowan standing behind the stand, with his red hair and bright blue eyes, serving his special "ginger lemonade". I looked up at the top of the stand, at the sign on top, the one Zoe had hand painted while Rowan was in the hospital when he was just 6 or 7. At first, in my head, I read it as "Lennon-aid" instead of "Lemonade". Then I smiled, and thought to myself, "awwwww, Lennon". Then it came to me...in that instant...Rowan was telling me to gift his lemonade stand to Lennon's family. I closed my eyes, cried, and said "okay Rowan". Honestly, it was not something I thought I would be able to give away anytime soon, but I was listening to my heart, to Rowan, and to God. I trusted them all...it was time. There was still life in it...still good to be made from behind it.</div>
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I talked to Zoe and Iris and we decided that maybe it should be "freshened up" or modified a little bit, so that it was ready for their family, and instantly we all 3 knew what we needed to do to it. Over the next few weeks, we did just that...we prepared Rowan's lemonade stand for Lennon's family. I messaged her Mommy, Marci and asked if it was something she would want...she confirmed that it was indeed something they would be honored to have. I asked if her girls could use it to continue their late sister Lennon's legacy and be able to raise money for her memorial charity "Lennon-aid". She said "definitely". Iris drew their Lennon-aid logo and I hand-painted it. I decoupaged photos of Lennon and Rowan on little wood plaques, so these angels' beautiful faces could forever be emblazoned on the stand. Iris and I painted and added dragonflies to the sides of the stand because dragonflies are an important symbol and sign in the Walther families life since Lennon passed.<br />
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The stand was ready for them in time for Lennon's angel-versary this month, on June 1st, but Marci and I could not align our schedules in time...instead it was God's timing. I dropped the lemonade stand off this past Thursday, early, early, in the morning before they had even woken up. I placed all the pieces, and the bag of Rowan's left over supplies, near their garage and left it with a card. <br />
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Shortly afterwards, Marci started texting me. She was up, had seen it and was in tears...happy tears. I asked her to send me pictures of the girls once they were awake and had seen it too. A few hours later, she did. She sent me pictures and video. <br />
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(Just look at these precious faces!!!)<br />
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She and the girls had set it up and couldn't wait to do their first lemonade stand for Lennon-aid. I texted her and told her to make sure to tell me when they did, so I could come try their lemonade and make a donation in memory of Rowan and Lennon. She said "deal"! Then...she started freaking out, texting me like crazy because of something that happened at that moment...a HUGE orange dragonfly landed by the stand! She tried desperately to get a photo as it came and went, but she was unable to. She told me that she had never seen an orange dragonfly, until that morning, just like she had never seen a bright pink dragonfly until one started to visit her after Lennon went to heaven. And you may remember that I had a bright blue dragonfly stay with me for over an hour at the cemetery just a couple weeks ago when I was journaling to Rowan about Lennon's angel-versary, and another blue one visit me here at the house as I cleaned the stand up to give to them.<br />
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We just cannot deny that these are signs from our sweet angels. I never used to see dragonflies, but since I started getting this lemonade stand ready to give to Marci and her girls, they have been present...for myself and for Marci. Thank you Lennon. Thank you Rowan. Keep them coming...pink, orange, blue, any color you choose. It helps us feel your presence here on this side of the veil. </div>
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Marci, I pray you and your family enjoy this lemonade stand for many years to come, that you raise lots of money for your charity Lennon-aid, that you make as many beautiful memories as we did. Rowan's ginger lemonade recipe card used to say "if life gives you lemons, sell lemonade to help others"... but I love how you see it too... that we both "took the sourest lemon life has to offer and will turn it in to something resembling lemonade." </div>
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Love you and yours! This stand belongs to you now.<br />
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I pray it gets visited by dragonflies again and again... until we are all reunited in heaven.<br />
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As I learned from you... we are one day closer.<br />
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-39882068294000392202019-06-09T21:59:00.002-07:002019-06-09T21:59:17.585-07:00"Sunflowers friends and dandelion wishes": Rowan and Roman<div style="text-align: center;">
Rowan's young friend Roman and his family were in town this weekend so we got together for lunch and then went to visit Rowan's grave. On the way to the cemetery, Peter, Roman and I went in HEB to buy flowers. Roman picked out these beautiful sunflowers for Rowan.</div>
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Once we arrived at the cemetery I laid out my blanket and we sat down next to Rowan's grave. As I started to lay my flowers at the base of Rowan's grave, Roman was about to do the same... but he didn't. Instead, he looked around and took one of the sunflowers over to a more recently placed grave. He stuck the sunflower into the ground, sticking straight up from the dirt, and told us "I planted it". </div>
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He came back and got another one and "planted" it at our sweet friend Olivia's grave, which is just a few feet from Rowan's. </div>
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He did this again and again, "planting" all of the beautiful sunflowers at other people's resting places. </div>
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Of course his sweet mom and dad apologized to me and asked him a few times, "Roman, don't you want to give some to Rowan?", but I reassured them that this was not just fine, it was perfect, it was what he was supposed to do. I told them, maybe the other families need to see them there instead, and we smiled thinking that Rowan probably loved this... maybe Rowan even told him to do it;) </div>
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It was the sweetest thing! I am sure that none of us will ever forget it. </div>
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Just like last year, when Roman pulled out his little toy tractor and digger and started "digging" in the dirt that lay over his friend's grave, blowing the only dandelion we could see, before going over and leaving the toy on the grave of an infant nearby. That toy remains there a year later, on a stranger's grave. A priceless reminder, that there is no "right" or "wrong" way for a small child to visit the gravesite of another child. At it's very core, it feels unnatural, unfair, and it is certainly unwritten... but it happens, and unfortunately, in the life of medically fragile children or children with rare diseases, it happens all too often. Rowan lost way too many friends before he himself died... more friends than I have lost adults in my adult life. I feel awful that Roman even has to visit Rowan at a cemetery. I have zero expectations of how he should act when he is there. But, he has behaved perfectly each time! Because he acts how he feels, and that is all we can ask or expect of a child. And this time he wanted to "plant" sunflowers in these exact spots. </div>
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And I am blessed to have been there to witness it.</div>
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I love this family so much. We met via Facebook because our boys were battling the same rare disease as well as severe multiple food allergies, and neither of them had a bone marrow match available in the world. We live about 3 hours apart, both in Texas. Our boys are named Rowan and Roman... aka "the Texas RoRos". After over a year of being "FB friends", we met half way just before we left for Seattle for transplant, so that we could finally meet in person. Then, when Rowan started to really decline, they immediately packed up and flew to Seattle to see us. They saw Rowan, from outside his sliding glass door, the last day before he slipped into a coma. Him smiling and waving to Roman is one of the last videos I have before Rowan moved to the PICU, where he died 2 months later. </div>
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We will be friends for life now, not just FB friends, true friends.</div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight"><br /></msreadoutspan><msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">Now, let me back up a little bit...</msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">When we met up with them in Austin, the first time Rowan and Roman met each other, the last thing Rowan did in the parking lot of the restaurant, was blow on a dandelion and make a wish. </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">His wish was that Roman find his match. Rowan also told me he couldn't wait until Roman got older so he could help teach him things, especially about how to deal with his disease. He wanted to be like a big brother to him. I'm sad that never got to happen, but I believe Rowan will always watch out for Roman from heaven. He is now his guardian angel. </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">Roman now has a little baby sister, Luciana. The day she was born (before I even knew Nicole had gone into labor), I had a dream where Rowan was once again blowing a dandelion. This was so very meaningful because Luciana (thank you Jesus), is a perfect, non SDS affected, match for Roman should he get to the point of requiring a transplant! Rowan's dandelion wish came true.</msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">I have been working on a gift for sweet baby Lulu for months. I have not completely finished it, but once I knew they were coming to visit, I wanted to at least show it to the Shen's, so I brought it with me Saturday. It is a baby quilt I made her. The only thing left to do is hand-quilting the layers together. </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">I made poor Nicole cry (I'm sorry), </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">but I am so glad I was able to show it to them there at the cemetery. It just felt right, giving it to them at Rowan's resting place. </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">I know he was watching us, and I have no doubt that he added his love to the quilt. </msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">I used materials with special meaning to make this quilt, the most important being several prints that had dandelions on them, and on the back...material from the sleeves of 3 of Rowan's personal shirts...2 of his "Rally for Rowan" shirts, and his own Roman/"Brave Eggroll" shirt. I hope to finish the hand-quilting this month so little Lulu can enjoy some tummy time on it, but I am beyond blessed to at least have photos of the beautiful Shen family with the quilt, sitting next to Rowan's grave.</msreadoutspan></div>
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<msreadoutspan class="msreadout-line-highlight msreadout-inactive-highlight">Lulu, I promise to finish it soon so you can lay on it, play on it, and enjoy it...</msreadoutspan></div>
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And Peter... oh Peter.</div>
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Thank you for being you...</div>
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for being one of the most selfless, compassionate, human beings I have ever met. </div>
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You are a rock to your family. </div>
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Please know how great you are. </div>
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And thank you for praying "talking to my boy" each time you visit. </div>
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It means the world to me.</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-13495414783774771342019-06-07T20:11:00.002-07:002019-06-07T20:11:57.392-07:002019 Cereal Totals: "Fighting Hunger...Feeding Hope"... in memory of Rowan<div style="text-align: center;">
Today was one of the good days...no, one of the great days. This morning was the 2019 Breakfast of Champions at Methodist Children's Hospital and this afternoon was the final reveal for the 2019 Rowan Windham Memorial Cereal Drive. What began as 4000 servings being collected from Rowan's hospital bed on the 3rd floor, for the MCH summer cereal drive, has turned into an enormous legacy that continues to grow each year.</div>
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This year the goal was 225,000 servings. </div>
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Well, as I predicted, we blew that out of the water! </div>
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We presented the San Antonio Food Bank with: </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>277,748</b></span> servings of cereal today. </div>
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This will be distributed to children in SA and the surrounding area (16 counties!) this summer while they are out of school.</div>
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Thank you to Methodist Children's Hospital Nurses, Staff and Leadership, Kens 5/Kens Cares, Reporter Marvin Hurst, Michael Guerra/SA Food Bank, all of the business and groups and friends and families who donated cereal or volunteered, everyone who called in and donated during the telethon on Monday (during which we raised over $8000 for the Food Bank!) or donated online, etc. This is indeed a group effort. One Rowan was certainly guiding and smiling down on from Heaven.</div>
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Some of my favorite pictures of the day were those from the Breakfast of Champions, which is a special event that was added to the cereal drive last year. </div>
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Our amazing panel this year included Bryn Forbes of the SA Spurs, Sean Elliot NBA broadcaster and former SA Spur, his health and fitness enthusiast and speaker wife Claudia Zapata-Elliot, and Costanza Roeder founder of Hearts Need Art.</div>
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Kens Cares and Methodist Children's Hospital asked for nominations back in April, of children in the community who exemplified similar charitable qualities to Rowan, such as selflessness and service. They ended up with 80 nominees! It was tough to do, but the field was narrowed down to 13 and those 13 children were honored with a Breakfast of Champions today. </div>
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Some of these kids had started their own non-profits, some were campaigning to stop bullying, others had collected toys for children in the hospital, or shaved their head to raise money for childhood cancer research. One had collected gift cards for law enforcement officers so they would know they had support, and could take a break and grab lunch or coffee for free. All of the children were doing amazing things in the community. It was awe-inspiring!</div>
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These community/world changers had the opportunity to ask our esteemed panel questions. They asked for advice, asked what motivated them, who had inspired them, etc. It was such a heart warming event. At the end, I spoke briefly, telling these kids a little bit about Rowan and his missions in life. Then I reminded them that they are not just changing the world now with these acts of kindness...if they keep it up they could be leaving their legacy behind someday too. I explained how legacy was defined by "leaving your mark on the world", and that while I wish I could bring Rowan back every day, I am so proud of the way he left his mark on the world...still today, two and half years after his death. I told them how proud we all were of them, and the mark they were leaving as well. What I wish I would have added, is that Rowan would have been proud to be friends with each and every one of them!</div>
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Here are just a few pictures of the panel and some of the winners of the awards...</div>
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Of course there was a big stir having Sean Elliot and Bryn Forbes in the room...I mean come on, San Antonio loves its Spurs! </div>
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But let me tell you, they were all so humble and kind, and it was a pleasure to meet them and to get to talk to them a little more about Rowan. They seemed genuinely honored to be a part of the event, and offered me heartfelt condolences and hugs. A huge thank you to each of them for giving of their valuable time to encourage these young children to continue making the good.</div>
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After the breakfast and panel, everyone headed downstairs to the lobby for the final cereal total reveal and presentation to the SA Food Bank. It is always a sight to behold... wall to wall cereal, that we have been stacking up as fast as it is dropped off in the lobby all week long. The colorful display just makes you smile and warms your hearts. </div>
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Lots of laughter, hugs, tears, smiles, and joy felt in that hospital lobby today. It is so wonderful to see people come together for a good cause. "Amazing Together" is an understatement!</div>
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After the reveal and the cheers, after the interviews and photo opportunities...comes the hard physical work...</div>
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This amazing team wheeled out huge racks, stacked and wrapped pallets, filled water melon bins, and helped stage and fill not 1, not 2, not even just 3...but 4 huge trucks headed for the SA Food Bank. And we did it quickly, due to the 100 degree heat, I might add;)</div>
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"Fighting Hunger...Feeding HOPE!"</div>
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Can't wait to do it again next year:)</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-88057033569897378252019-03-06T21:44:00.000-08:002019-03-06T21:44:04.448-08:0039 Forget-me-nots, 6 leaves, 2 angel friends, 1 priceless evening...<div style="text-align: center;">
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I have had the wonderful opportunity to serve on the Methodist Children's Hospital Family Advisory Board over this past year. We work with the staff at the hospital and try to find ways to improve processes and experiences, to bless the patients and their families, as well as support the nurses and staff. One of our big goals was to honor the patients we have lost and provide their families with a semblance of peace. We wanted them to know that their child's life mattered, not just to them, but to the hospital staff as well. This past Fall we hosted the first Remembrance ceremony, and last night we hosted the second one. Families were invited to come and bring a photo of their loved one. I was lucky enough to be in charge of decorating the table where we would place their tea lights as their names were read by the Chaplain. </div>
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I chose a nice green table cloth and a vase that looked like a tree, as the ceremony happens right in front of the hospital memory trees. Child Life had recently added brightly colored butterflies around the trees, so I created a bright bouquet of flowers to match. I printed the name cards, got a pretty wildflower plate to place tissues on for anyone who may need them during the ceremony, and framed a "Remembering your loved ones" sign that I had made. </div>
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Everything was coming together nicely, but I felt like something was missing. I texted the head of our board and told her that I wanted to plant seeds to start little plants for the families for the next ceremony we have scheduled. I apologized that I hadn't thought of it sooner, so that I could have done it for this one. I let her know I would pick a flower, like forget-me-knots, and get them ready for the next Remembrance Ceremony. I went ahead and bought the seeds and starter set so I would have it for next time. </div>
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Not more than an hour or two later I was walking in to Target and you won't believe what I found... tiny little pots with flowers in them, and of course... some of them were forget-me-nots. </div>
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I looked up and said "thank you Rowan" taking it as a sign. I texted the head of the board and told her I was going to buy all of them that they had in the New Braunfels Target. Then, I started counting them out, and I burst into tears. No joke- there were 39 flower pots. 39! </div>
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39 is the number of families we had invited, the number of name cards I had printed, the number of children we were honoring last night. I couldn't believe what a <i>God-wink</i> that was. It made her cry too when I texted her, heck it even made the cashier cry when I explained why I was buying them all! So special.</div>
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The ceremony was beautiful. </div>
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There were tears of course, but there were also smiles, hugs, friendships formed, families reunited with special staff members, and we accomplished our mission... there was indeed a semblance of peace. Families were able to share with other families, people who have experienced similar losses, parents who understood. Child Life had an area for the siblings to play before the ceremony, so the adults could mingle and share their stories with each other and with staff members. I was impressed by many things. First of all, I was proud of what the Family Advisory Board was able to bring to fruition in conjunction with the hospital staff. Second, I was blown away by the attendance and support of the hospital staff. From maintenance, to the cafeteria, to nurses, doctors, transport, therapy dogs, administration and leadership...the atrium was full of employees from Methodist Children's Hospital... actually calling them employees didn't fit last night. The Methodist Children's Hospital "Family" was present, and played a huge role in the event. Finally, the families that came impressed me. It was so touching to hear their stories. I made friends that I know will be friends for life now. We exchanged phone numbers and emails. I received text messages later that evening. People not just yearning to feel their children's presence again, but families willing to share with us and with each other, and families that sat silent as they listened to other's stories as well. Some lost children at birth, some just hours old, some days old, and some after years (like myself). What I loved most was that while I was consoling a mother and father who didn't get to make memories with their child as they grew up, they were simultaneously consoling me for having the strength to relive all of the milestones I did get to share with my son. True grace... that is what I witnessed. Grief with grace.</div>
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After the opening prayer, reading of the names and the lighting of the tea lights, and closing prayer, families from the last ceremony who had signed up for a memory leaf for their child were invited to come to the front and assist maintenance in installing their child's name plate on one of the memory trees. Rowan passed away at Seattle Children's, but he practically lived at Methodist Children's Hospital, spending nearly half of his life inside those walls over his ten short years. So they graciously honored his life too. He received his leaf. He is on the memory tree now. </div>
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Some of you may recall, Rowan actually pointed to a leaf on the tree when it was located on the 3rd floor many, many years ago and told me "this is the one I want to be on one day". </div>
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At the time, I was taken aback. I didn't want to think that would ever need to happen, I hoped he would outlive us all. He chose a leaf next to his angel friend Chrissie. He was 3 when she passed away at the age of 4. He wanted his leaf to be right next Chrissie's. He visited her leaf every time he was at the hospital, for the next 6-7 years. I have so many photos of him kissing her leaf, blowing it kisses, touching it, running his fingers across it like he was reading braille, committing it to memory. </div>
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Well, the leaf next to Chrissie's was actually taken a year or so after hers was placed, but during the past several years of construction, these memory trees have been housed in storage so no more were placed. I wasn't sure I would ever see them again, let alone that Rowan would finally get his wish... to be next to Chrissie's leaf. I told this story to the maintenance man there last night and I chose a leaf that was just one leaf away from Rowan's very first angel friend, Chrissie. I cried the whole time we screwed it in, but they were tears of many kinds. First tears of grief fell from my eyes... I was missing my son, wishing he never died, that he never even needed a leaf, etc. But then they turned into tears of joy... See, Rowan knew, he always knew, but he didn't just know, he actually was at peace with his life and his fate. He really did <i>want</i> that leaf, he prayed for it...</div>
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and I was honoring his wishes...at last. Thank you for that MCH. Once his leaf was installed, the maintenance man asked me if he could give me a hug. He was so sweet, so understanding. He wasn't just doing a job. He wasn't just using his skills and tools to install our leaves. He was using his heart and soul as well. I hope he knows how much that meant...how much it was evident...how much it was appreciated. What a difference he made last night.</div>
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On that note, I want to take a moment to thank everyone involved, <b><i>everyone</i></b>! Thank you God, MCH, Caitlin, Colin, the FAB board, the Chaplain, the families, and each and every person (and dog) who attended. <b>We ARE better together</b>... last night was proof of that.</div>
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And Rowan- you did it baby, you got your leaf! </div>
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I will kiss it, run my fingers across it (and Chrissie's), I will blow it kisses... every single time I step foot in that hospital for as long as I live. I promise you that, son. And I will definitely "<b>forget-you-not</b>".</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-20105021773384290222019-02-20T19:04:00.004-08:002019-02-20T19:04:56.680-08:00"Charlotte Days" are my favorite days...<div style="text-align: center;">
One of my favorite things to do in life is to visit Rowan's friend Charlotte...she's my friend too of course...actually my best little friend, but she was Rowan's friend first. We usually play a board game right away, which she always wins. Then we do some kind of arts and crafts project. We laugh until we are rolling on the floor, we both love puns, and we reminisce about Rowan here and there too. My "Charlotte days", are my favorite days.</div>
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Here are some pictures from my visit with Charlotte just a couple weeks ago. I am seeing her again tomorrow, and I cannot wait! But first I wanted to share a glimpse of our most recent time together.</div>
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We played SLAPZI (awesome game), and as usual...Charlotte won!</div>
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Before we started our Valentine's Crafts, Charlotte remembered that she wanted to show me something. She pulled this beauty out from under the couch. </div>
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She had made a personalized scrapbook about all of her and Rowan's time together. It spanned over 2 years but now some of the photos are over 4 years old, from them meeting on Valentine's Day in the hospital play room, through their playdates at the Zoo, Magik Theater, Doseum, the Riverwalk, to his Baptism Day, etc. It brought me to tears...happy tears. I asked her if her Mom had helped and she quickly answered "well, she did buy the binder". I asked her how long it took her to make and she said "a few days, but only because my Mom would make me take breaks". My heart nearly burst. What a sweet girl. How much energy and love she put in to this book. It was priceless to view. She even had a section with all of Rowan's cards to her, pictures he drew her, and his memory cards, etc. She titled that section "Cards and Reminders of Rowan". Here are just a few of her scrapbook pages...</div>
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This is Charlotte's scrapbook, she was just sharing it with me, but little does she know, I will carry these precious memories and her beautiful account of them in my heart forever. This is true friendship...a friendship with loss...one where their time together was cut too short...but memories that she still adores, just like I do.</div>
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This was one of my very favorite photos that she had in her precious photo album...they were so very little here...ugh... my heartstrings. It is beyond a treasure...</div>
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After she and I poured over this beautiful book, we decided it was time to craft! With Valentine's Day just around the corner at the time, she helped me try out all of the art projects I would be doing with the patients and their siblings at the hospital. And as always, she helped me put a special "Charlotte" spin on some of them. She is always so creative!</div>
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Sweet girl made a card to represent she and I too:) Adorable!</div>
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We ended our playdate the same way we always do, with a cute photo and then a crazy photo... I insist on the first one, and Charlotte insists on the second one, obviously:)</div>
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But I love and cherish them both, every single time.</div>
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Thanks for being my best little friend Charlotte. Thanks for allowing me to smile, for making me laugh, and for letting me love you.</div>
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See you tomorrow sweet girl, when we will make one of our greatest masterpieces ever! Can't wait!</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-89984949719793199592018-12-31T22:31:00.001-08:002019-01-01T18:42:47.273-08:00What I learned from Rowan in 2018: "A life well lived, leaves a legacy that can live on forever!"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Another year comes to a close tonight. Another year since Rowan went to heaven too. To be honest...I didn't think I would make it 2 minutes past his death, let alone 2 years. Without Rowan's life messages, I don't think I would have. But Rowan taught me more in his short 10 years than I have ever learned the rest of my years combined, and more than I likely ever will. </div>
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Rowan taught me to "love my life", to "make the good". He knew he would "be fine- either way". He cared more about others than he ever worried about himself. He had nothing but love, light, faith and "hope" in his heart, in ALL situations...even in the end. </div>
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When I am at my worst, when I think I feel hopeless (not even a word I like to type, and one I actually refuse to say out-loud), I think about Rowan's messages. I hear his voice in my head, or I watch his videos. I read my old blogs with his amazingly inspirational quotes... and I realize that I have to keep going, that I must, but more importantly...that <b>I can</b>. </div>
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If Rowan could do what he did, and the way he did it...so can I. I owe it to him, and to myself, to live my life in the manner that he did. And the world is a better place in the process. That is the very definition of a legacy. His life, and the way he lived it, deserves to be not just remembered, but to be emulated. And if those of us that knew him, loved him, or even just followed his story, do that...his legacy lives on...Rowan's lives on.</div>
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I didn't want this year to come to a close without me showing you all some of the ways Rowan's legacy lives on, because of so many of you. You need to know that you continue to make a difference...that you are "making the good" in Rowan's memory, and you are making a difference in the world...a big one!</div>
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For starters, thank you to every single one of you who sent me cards, gave me flowers, texted, called, posted or messaged me on Rowan's Heaven date. </div>
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It was a difficult day, but you made it better. I can tell you from experience, people who lose a child don't ever want to imagine a world without them, so it helps when others remember their loved one too. It doesn't bring them back, but it helps keep the memory alive. I couldn't possibly begin to list all of you that I'd like to thank for what you did for me on December 15th this year, but know that I appreciated it all. I heard from doctors and nurses from San Antonio to Seattle...people who cared for him as an infant all the way to the doctor who was with us at the very end as he was removed from life support. Rowan's grave was visited by many, from his fellow transplant and Kidd's Kids' friend from Dallas, Christa...</div>
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to a fellow angel mom from New Braunfels, who when she arrived, still saw my tear on the plaque at the foot of Rowan's grave... (Love you Marci...ATWTL)…</div>
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to the daughter of one of the teachers who worked for me many years ago, and so on.</div>
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Many of you sent me pictures of you wearing your Hope t-shirts on December 15th, some people donated blood that day, others volunteered at food banks or children's hospitals in Rowan's memory. This lovely lady helped lay wreaths on the graves of fallen soldiers at Fort Sam, wearing her "Love your life"/Hope shirt...</div>
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I can only imagine how happy that made Rowan. He never missed an opportunity to thank a soldier or veteran for their service.</div>
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We hosted a holiday arts and crafts event at the hospital again, for the patients and their siblings, and it was so much fun.</div>
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However, what I most wanted to reveal to you though, is pictures of the wonderful December donations we were able to give to parents of patients at Methodist Children's Hospital in memory of Rowan, from the Amazon Wish List so many of you graciously purchased items from. Look at all of this!</div>
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My van was full of gifts for the parents!</div>
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Just before I closed the doors, to head to the hospital, I was struck by something... the "smiles" from the Amazon boxes made me smile. Then I realized, that some of those smiles were coming from "Rowan's seat" in my van...it was so poignant, because I just knew he was smiling down on us, so happy that instead of being sad at that moment, we chose to "make the good" for others. It was perfect. So perfect, I decided to strap those particular boxes into the seat belt, into Rowan's seat belt...so I did.</div>
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This sight made me smile even more:)</div>
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The Child Life Staff was thrilled about the donations, and so grateful. The kids are usually taken care of during the holidays, but not always the parents staying with them. But see, Rowan thought of the parents all the time. He thought of me, all the time. He would LOVE that we blessed the parents this Christmas too!</div>
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Child Life actually facetimed me a few days later and they were so joyful, excited to tell me that it had been one of the most successful events they had ever done. They put all of the gifts out like a store, for the kids to come out of their rooms with their parents to "shop" for presents for their parents staying with them. How special. </div>
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Thank you all. <b>YOU</b> did that. You helped Rowan's legacy live on, and in the process, you made the world a little better. We can't thank you enough.</div>
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One last picture... this is the Music Therapist from Seattle Children's Hospital. </div>
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She spent countless hours singing, playing drums, ukulele, etc. with Rowan. He LOVED his time with her... he LOVED her! You also helped us gift her with an electronic KORG wave drum set for the music therapy program there at SCH this December in memory of Rowan's angel-versary. This drum set has hundreds and hundreds of amazing sounds and is completely portable. Her thank you note told me just how much the patients are loving it, and how much Rowan would have approved of these special drums. <i>(*Kathleen and crew- an extra special thank you!)</i></div>
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So, as 2018 closes, I just want to thank you all for helping us continue Rowan's legacy. Thank you for continuing to make the good in sooooo many ways. Please never stop letting me know how you are. It blesses my soul, and keeps me going. </div>
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May you "Love your life" in 2019, and never stop making the good in this world... ever. </div>
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May you create legacies of your own, that make the world a better place... always.</div>
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Love, Rowan</div>
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<i>& his Mommy, Carrie</i></div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-41783683719253816152018-11-17T21:02:00.002-08:002018-11-17T21:12:10.084-08:00From the grave to the cross on the hill...remembering "Hope" today with the Guardians of the Children<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today was an overwhelmingly wonderful day. The weather could not have been more beautiful. The friendship and support from the Guardian's of the Children Von Ormy, once again blew me away. We all remembered Rowan, or "Hope" as he was known as a Lil Guardian of the GOC, and we rode from Gruene Harley Davidson in New Braunfels to Rowan's resting place in the Hill Country, then out to The Empty Cross in Kerrville, Texas, and finally to lunch together. Every detail of this day was special and perfect. I cannot thank them enough for all the ways they continue to honor and remember my son... their lil brother... Hope.</div>
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I put on my shirt from last year's ride...</div>
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brought Rowan's vest, and some orange roses...</div>
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and drove myself to Gruene Harley Davidson where the GOC was gathering for the ride.</div>
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"Senior" was my ride for the day, and he helped me lay Rowan's vest in the back of his bike, so Rowan would be with us in spirit. This would be Rowan's third ride. His first was in the physical, when "Batman" took him on his first ride, the day the gave "Hope" his vest. Last year, Rowan's vest rode with Batman again, as they drove out to the Empty Cross. Today, Senior let me ride on the back of his bike, with Rowan's vest in the trunk behind us... I cried most of the time we were on the road (about 2 hours), but they were happy tears. Rowan had to be so happy looking down...knowing that he and I were finally on a bike together with the Guardians of the Children. It had finally come full circle.</div>
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The riders lined up to head out to Rowan's resting place...</div>
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The ride was beautiful. My time to reflect...priceless.</div>
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And what a heart filled moment as we all pulled in to the cemetery and made our way around to his site...</div>
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When we all got off the bikes and started heading to his spot, we talked about the day they were all there with us as we laid him to rest. It had been an un-Texas like day back then, 18 degrees I believe. But they all were there anyway. Like the family they are.</div>
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I started walking toward his grave, and they blew me away again with another surprise. A few members drove in a truck, instead of on a motorcycle, so they could transport a special gift, these beautiful flowers on a stand with this precious photo of "Hope" in his vest and bandana. His smile in this photo says everything, his eyes exude pure joy. It shows how proud he was to be a part of this group, a member of this family.</div>
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This was "Hope". This was how he felt being known as "Hope". This was how happy he was to be a Lil Guardian. It literally takes my breath away, because it takes me right back to this moment when he was patched in:).</div>
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They left no detail out... "Love your life", "Hope", "GOC"... perfection!</div>
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I laid his vest on the stand, and almost fell to me knees. Such a fitting memorial for our boy. It almost felt like the day of the burial though. So special, so poignant.</div>
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I just love this picture. It sums up how special the GOC Von Ormy made today...no, how special they made Rowan's life. They are another reason he loved his life so very much!</div>
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They wanted to take my picture with the flowers, but admittedly, I hid my bandaged chin (from my stitches last week) behind one of the gorgeous orange leaves:)</div>
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It was such a great tribute to Hope.</div>
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I said a few words, we held hands as a group prayer was led, and then one by one the members each laid a single orange rose at the foot of his grave as they spoke to him privately. Beautiful. Simply beautiful. A day I will never forget.</div>
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After our time there with Rowan, we headed back out for the remainder of the ride, over an hour to Kerrville. Again, I reflected on Rowan's life, how special it was, how special the GOC are, how well they worked together with Rowan, and continue to do so. </div>
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See, the proceeds of today's ride will go to purchase bicycles in Rowan's memory for underprivileged children in San Antonio at Avenida this Spring. Rowan donated a bike to a little boy there before he even had a bike of his own, and he did so happily! That legacy continues, and they donated around 200 bikes last year, all with Rowan's bracelet on the handle bars. I hope they can give away even more than that this year. </div>
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<i><b>*If you are interested in helping with this endeavor over the next 3-4 months, please reach out to me, either via Facebook Messenger, messaging me on this blog, or by text or email. Maybe you want to purchase a bike or two, or maybe you just want to make a donation towards a bike...anything is greatly appreciated. I would love to continue Rowan's legacy of Hope as well as the GOC's goal of helping children in the community who are going through tough times. Thank you!</b></i></div>
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As you can imagine, with this as my view, that hour plus ride to Kerrville brought more tears of happiness, more memories, more reflection, more understanding.</div>
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The Empty Cross sculpture is noticeabe, even as you drive up the hill...</div>
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Then, as you get closer, the scope and size of it really hits you...</div>
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We all walked the paths together...</div>
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(*of course....:)</div>
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We found the rock that the GOC left there just over a year ago. It has faded in the Texas sun of course, and some photos have peeled away, but you can still see Rowan in his helmet the day of his first ride with Batman...awesome.</div>
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I'm so happy that my dear friend Stacy actually ended up becoming a part of the GOC Von Ormy after they came as guests to last year's ride. Sharing things like this with her and Emmet just makes it all that more special.</div>
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Brian was able to join us at the cross, which was great.</div>
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Before leaving, we had the opportunity to write on rocks for our loved ones, or leave prayers to God, and leave them there on the grounds.</div>
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I added the Hope and Courage rocks that I recently took to Rowan and Jalene's graves. They were both Lil Guardians before they passed, and I firmly believe that they are both now full Angel Guardians in Heaven, watching over us all.</div>
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Our last stop was for lunch, and boy was it a beautiful day to sit outside and laugh and eat, and remember what life is all about... honoring your loved ones, remembering family and friends,giving back to your community, "loving your life" and "making the good" whenever and wherever you can...and if it involves blue skies, motorcycles, the open road, and a great bunch of guys and gals...even better!</div>
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Thank you GOC Von Ormy.</div>
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For making Rowan, "Hope", one of you.</div>
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For never <i>forgetting</i> him,</div>
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but even more so, for always <i>remembering</i> him!</div>
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As I said today at the cemetery:</div>
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Hope was something I found hard to find after Rowan died, but when I thought of how much he loved every single day of his life, no matter how difficult it was, I realized... that was his gift to me...his reminders, his legacy, the way he lived his life, were actually teaching me how to survive the rest of mine.</div>
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Thank you for reminding me to hold on to Hope...just as you all have.</div>
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In loving memory of Rowan Jameson "Hope" Windham </div>
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Lil Guardian </div>
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Guardians of the Children</div>
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Von Ormy Chapter</div>
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Texas</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-67347886473180044912018-11-11T22:55:00.002-08:002018-11-11T23:14:58.599-08:00All I really need to know... I learned at Friendsgiving 2018...<br />
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This afternoon was just supposed to be a simple get-together, a "Friendsgiving 2018" hosted by Manuel Diotte & Lucinda Suarez, of Ferrari Kids. We all signed up for dishes to bring to the potluck. There were board games to play, music in the background, and plenty of food for everyone. It was so nice.</div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">As the afternoon began to play out though, I realized it was so much more than a simple "get-together" though.</span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike></div>
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Manny, Lucy, current and past Ferrari kids, their families, and supporters of Ferrari kids, all came together for an afternoon of food, fun and fellowship. We started the meal with prayer, and then Manny asked everyone to go around the room and tell a little bit about themselves. That is when the enormity of the evening became more clear. God's plan was revealed.</div>
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Manny quoted Robert Fulghum, from "All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten" when he mentioned one of the most inspirational quotes that affected his life:</div>
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<b>"Hold hands, and stick together".</b></div>
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At first, I smiled and thought "oh yeah, that is a good one", but I did not realize how impactful it would be, until the afternoon progressed.</div>
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I will try to explain what I witnessed and encountered, and I hope you somehow feel what I felt, because it was beautiful.</div>
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Bit by bit, God revealed His presence and His plan in all of this. His hand was in ALL of it. </div>
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Here is a little history...</div>
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~Manny and I both spoke at a charity event nearly 10 years ago, "Friends of Anglers". That is when we first met. Rowan was a toddler. Manny had more surgeries than Rowan at that time, though we joked about it not being a competition.</div>
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~Several years later, multiple people nominated Rowan for the Ferrari Kid Program, but he was almost always hospitalized or immune compromised, so he could never make it. </div>
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~Eventually, Rowan was blessed to have Manny come make sure he got a personal ride around a parking lot in a Ferrari, one day when he wasn't quite up to a full event.</div>
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~Then, Rowan was eventually able to attend a full Ferrari Kids red carpet event, just a few months before he left for Seattle.</div>
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~Rowan then left for Seattle, where he had 2 back to back bone marrow transplants. He spent his final 6 months hospitalized there, and passed away there on December 15th 2016.</div>
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~Manny asked Keiba Easterling and myself to be guest speakers at the 2017 Ferrari Kids Gala. We both had sons who had attended the same Ferrari Kids red carpet shopping spree, both passed away in the following year, and are now both buried at the same hill country cemetery just a few yards away from one another.</div>
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~I asked Manny to be one of the guest speakers on the panel of the Methodist Children's Hospital "Rowan's Breakfast of Champions" this past Summer, held during the Rowan Windham Memorial Cereal Drive, where over 200,000 servings of cereal were raised for kids in our community through the San Antonio Food Bank.</div>
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But see, all of that is just the history that exists between Manny and I, or Manny and Rowan, or Rowan and the Ferrari Kids, or Manny and the Cereal Drive. Today, I realized how much bigger a net has actually been spread.</div>
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Manny asked me to start off the introductions. As I did so, instead of passing the baton to my immediate right, my eye was drawn about 10 people down the table...to Jordan. Jordan is one of the happiest, most joyful, most gracious souls I have ever met! She is 17 years old. When she was born, her parents were told she would never make it this far, by a very long shot. They were told to take her home from the hospital, love on her, and to make the most of her time here... However, thanks be to God, Jordan IS still here. Her laugh, her voice, her smile, are all simply infectious! Ironically, I met her at Methodist Children's Hospital just 2 weeks ago when I was hosting a Halloween Arts and Crafts event in memory of Rowan. That day she called me "friend" repeatedly. She kept saying "thank you friend", "that's so nice of you friend", "you're my new friend", etc. Tonight when our eyes met, we both recognized each other instantly. She called across the room, "that's my friend, we did art together!". Jordan and I hung out quite a bit this afternoon. She has another surgical procedure coming up this week, and I promised to send her Thanksgiving crafts to do before and after that. She is currently running for "Queen of the 2019 Fiesta Especial Royal Court", and I would love to help her achieve that. 40% of all the money she raises will go to the charity of her choice. She chose Ferrari Kids;) The other 60% helps offset the cost of the Fiesta Especial Celebration Day which benefits the community-based instruction program for children and adults with disabilities at the Fiesta Carnival. If you are willing and able to make a donation towards Jordan's 2019 Fiesta Especial Royal Court Campaign, please do so. I would be honored to help her achieve her fundraising goals, and you would be contributing to such a great cause. (I will post details at the end of this post.)</div>
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Several people down the line, another Mom introduced herself to the group. Her daughter Hiromi and Rowan had hand painted Toms shoes at a MCH event almost 5 years ago. But prior to that even, Hiromi and her family had brought goodie bags (delivered by Minnie Mouse) to MCH while Rowan and one of his best friends Charlotte were hospitalized there during Valentine's Day. Hiromi did that because she battled cancer herself, spent so much time there, and knew what it was like to be in the hospital. Again, full circle...</div>
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I also saved several phone numbers in my phone tonight, as I met person after person, that God has brought together through Manny and the Ferrari Kids. We weren't saving each others contact information because we liked their style though, or because we needed to return dishes after the potluck. Instead, I exchanged numbers with people who either I was going to help with their next giving event, or we were planning a way to give back to others together, or we were both in the process of writing books to tell our son's stories, etc. It was all so more good could be made.</div>
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We were literally <b>holding hands and sticking together</b>. </div>
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Manny, Lucinda, Ferrari Kids, family and friends who attended tonight, and to those that could not make it...</div>
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We were brought together for a reason. It was a pleasure seeing everyone today, and I look forward to our future gatherings. But know this... we are all in this together. Lets continue to "<b>Hold hands and stick together". </b>And thank you for that life lesson/reminder today Manny.</div>
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The only other moment that I want to make sure to document tonight is the moment I knew Rowan was there with us. </div>
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I really did enjoy talking to the other parents, and watching the young Ferrari Kids, but I cannot lie, it was overwhelming at times. I saw Rowan all over that room, in so many of those children, etc. </div>
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It was difficult to not physically share today with him. He would have loved it! They counted the fish in the tank, played bingo, and connect four, and bean bag toss in the hallway, etc. Rowan would have had a ball!</div>
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At one point I was so overcome with happiness at the sights and sounds of that room. I started video taping around the room as Manny and the kids played bingo. All of the sudden the song changed on the iPhone that was projecting music out into the room. It was "Hallelujah"... a song that Kainoa Kamaka played on his ukulele and sang at Rowan's funeral just less than 2 years ago. For a moment, it was too much. I walked outside into the rain, to catch my breath. I knew it was a sign that Rowan was there with us, just as I was missing him there, but it was also an earthly reminder that he wasn't there. I am human. My heart hurt. But at the same time, I trusted God that it was a sign of confirmation...Rowan was indeed there today.</div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dyaSE6AxBXFvHx-annV1Zn1JJ6efSHPnNPpN-LTWt9AjzU2x1_yqdgPSfYyc7Th7SyGQFglpR6HC085eP8ltA' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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Thank you Manny and Lucy. Thank you Jesus. Thank you to everyone in the Ferrari Kids Family. Thank you to all the Ferrari Kids Friends.</div>
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Happy Friendsgiving 2018!</div>
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God Bless.</div>
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<i>***ps... </i>to donate to Ms. Jordan Allen's "Queen of the 2019 Fiesta Especial Royal Court":<br />
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<b><u>Checks</u></b>- Box 28243 San Antonio, Texas 78228 ("Jordan Allen Campaign" in memo section)<br />
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<b><u>Online</u></b>- tinyurl.com/Jordan4Queen2019<br />
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<b><u>Paypal</u></b>- fiestaespecial@disabilitysa.org</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-39106193206268303432018-11-02T19:00:00.001-07:002018-11-02T19:00:26.793-07:00"Courage and Hope": Happy Birthday Jalene<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Jalene's 8th birthday was on October 25th. Rowan would tell us that she was still 4 in Heaven though (so her Mommy doesn't miss anything). Rowan joined Jalene in Heaven less than 2 years after she passed. It is one of my great sources of comfort, knowing that they are together again now...this time, neither of them is sick though, and they don't have to just play in the hospital art room, or watch each other fade. I can only imagine the colors they are creating with their artwork now.</div>
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I was not able to make it in to San Antonio on Jalene's birthday this year, so I went to Rowan's graveside in New Braunfels instead. I figured, they are together in Heaven, so maybe sitting at his would make me feel closer to her as well. I journaled to Rowan, and then wrote Jalene a birthday card. It had the most beautiful butterfly on it. It reminded me of the handprint butterfly that I helped Rowan and Jalene make in her home, just days before she went to heaven. </div>
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I also brought two special rocks that I had just purchased. One said "Hope" and the other said "Courage". If you know Jalene and Rowan's stories, then you know that The Guardians of the Children, Von Ormy Chapter adopted Jalene before she passed. They gave her a vest with the name "Courage" on it. They asked Rowan, way back then what his name would be if he was a Lil Guardian too and he said "If Jalene is Courage, then I want to be Hope". The GOC made that come true for Rowan before he left for transplant. He even wore his Lil Guardians vest, with the patch "Hope" on it during his first transplant. It is something that Jen and I cherish, the memories of our little fighters, Courage and Hope.</div>
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I brought orange and pink roses to represent Jalene and Rowan. We all know Rowan loved orange, but he also loved pink (wearing his pink shorty shorts every Sunday at home and in the hospital). Jalene also woke from a sleep once, when she was home on Hospice care, waved her hand in the air and said "make it all pink". </div>
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Once I was finally able to make it to Jalene's grave last week, I met her Mom and her little brother there. I arrived first, so I sat there for a while talking to Jalene, reading her the card, praying over the rocks, and just listening to the breeze. </div>
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(this laminated picture of Rowan and Jalene has been here, outside, for almost 2 years, and its still as good as new) </div>
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(there was the sweetest little fabric butterfly stuck in the ground too:)</div>
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In the corner of my eye I kept seeing leaves fall. It was so peaceful. Then I noticed that there was one leaf, orange and heart shaped of course, that seemed to be hanging out mid air. It was dancing in the wind, like a butterfly. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me, or that I was day dreaming, but the more I stared at it, the more I realized... it was dangling, dancing, several feet from the ground, but also several feet down from the branches. I took pictures, and then I video taped it. It was Rowan, I knew it. Showing me that he was there with me too. This leaf stayed there for an hour...and Jalene's little brother and I eventually figured out that a single spider web thread was holding it suspended in air. So yes, there was a reason it wasn't dropping to the ground like the rest, but when is the last time you saw something like that...a single leaf dangling from a spider web, dancing in the wind at your angel's angel friend's grave. I still believe it was Rowan, showing me that he and Jalene were dancing and twirling with joy in heaven.</div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxLHd9QNb3WDEkTz3jhui_uQcRdWq5dzqRxs4SbOGrD3kNrUzhxx-mI2UH85mJbu-XjgJvq7oEvtPAny7LY' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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We spent a little time together there...remembering Jalene, Joshua playing with the rocks, Jen reading Jalene's card, and me giving Jen some flip flops I had made with one of Jalene's famous sayings: "Love everyone the same!"</div>
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Before leaving, I got some donations for the hospital out of my trunk for Jalene's birthday fundraiser that her Mom hosts each year. Her brother jumped in the back of the trunk to check things out and he found my cemetery bag, the bag that I take with me to Rowan's grave each week. It had my journal, a sketchbook, Lisa Krantz's newspaper story in the Express News, bubbles, etc. He honed in on the bubble right away, and I told him to help himself. He waved it around and around. It was so cute. Of course two big bubbles danced around together for a while with Josh chasing them...no coincidence:)</div>
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Jalene, Rowan...Courage, Hope... <span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline !important; float: none; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">know that you are loved and missed deeply...</span></div>
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Rowan, this may be where I go to "sit and talk with you" for now...</div>
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and Jalene, this may be where I go to "sit and talk with you" for now...</div>
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But I know where you both truly are...<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline !important; float: none; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline !important; float: none; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Fly</span> high, dance in the wind, flutter your wings,</div>
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make the most beautiful heavenly art ever...</div>
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and keep painting that sky pink and orange for us, </div>
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along with all your other angel friends.</div>
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Happy Birthday Jalene!</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-83272017241898633892018-10-19T19:53:00.004-07:002018-10-19T19:53:44.662-07:00Dusti & Rowan...continuing to leave their footprints on this world~for good<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZLejqt_v8_sPXArxlznZHPL8ETGF_n0NRrXfDz8sIECib0GfohFRCuW3Y7ACmlNrRn1ufOPIPyktVh6qG_0-2f0Ny5ahZU3nyjZL4Ia1hy-TxmWmisZ-qI6iaZYMlvCAq9Wk83D36e8o/s1600/IMG_5278.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="395" data-original-width="526" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZLejqt_v8_sPXArxlznZHPL8ETGF_n0NRrXfDz8sIECib0GfohFRCuW3Y7ACmlNrRn1ufOPIPyktVh6qG_0-2f0Ny5ahZU3nyjZL4Ia1hy-TxmWmisZ-qI6iaZYMlvCAq9Wk83D36e8o/s400/IMG_5278.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Rowan had the pleasure of befriending a sweet young girl, a little bit older than himself, many years ago. Their older siblings played soccer together in two consecutive leagues over a period of 8+ years. As they did, Dusti and Rowan cheered them on, sucked on oranges, and colored in coloring books on blankets on the sidelines.</div>
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Eventually their friendship spilled outside of the soccer field, and Rowan and Dusti started spending time together alone...mostly supporting each other in each of their various charity endeavors. These two both had such big hearts for others from the start.</div>
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(Rowan attending Dusti's dance recital)</div>
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(Rowan dropping off dog and cat food and cleaning supplies to the animal shelter for Dusti's birthday fundraiser)</div>
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(Dusti coming to support Rowan during "The Rowan Jameson Windham Foundation Toughest Dog in Texas" charity dog run, supporting local children in the hospital.)</div>
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I could go on and on about what these two young people have each done for their community on their own, but another poignant part of their story is how much they affected each other, and how they continue to affect their community because they knew one another.</div>
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Don't get me wrong, this story isn't about Dusti carrying on Rowan's legacy, because they each actually had one of their own from the start. Yes, their friendship, allowed them to join forces for many of those causes...but Dusti had her own very big heart already!</div>
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Since Rowan's death, Dusti has had to overcome insurmountable grief and stress, at such a young, formative age...but she has done so...</div>
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poignantly...</div>
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beautifully...</div>
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and I could not be prouder of her.</div>
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She lost her young friend. She didn't just lose someone she played with, she lost someone she related to on such a beautiful level. She lost someone who shared her vision for helping those around her.</div>
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But she is fighting to overcome that loss.</div>
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And she is succeeding.</div>
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Dusti's most recent charity event was called "Sippin for Shoes" and she organized a wine tasting event at Dry Comal Creek Winery in the Texas Hill Country (where people could come donate shoes for the less fortunate, and she could raise funds for this goal, through ticket sales, silent auction, and donations.)</div>
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It was a very rainy day, but that didn't stop anyone.</div>
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Dusti and I chatted for quite a while beforehand. Oh how I love this girl. She continues to grow into such a beautiful young lady...with so much spark and so much spunk.</div>
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As the main part of the event started, the sun came out, and I was asked to come present a few things to Dusti.</div>
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She and I were both quite overwhelmed. </div>
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I think we both felt that Rowan should be there. That it wasn't the same without him.</div>
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But we leaned into one another, cried, hugged, and got on with it.</div>
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I told Dusti how proud I was of her, and reassured her how proud Rowan surely was too.</div>
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Then I presented her with 14 pairs of shoes for her charity.</div>
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The first 3 pair were the hardest to verbalize the story behind...</div>
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These 3 pair of Vans were from the back door of Rowan's bedroom closet...tags on, he never had the chance to grow into them...</div>
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I held my breath as I went into his room and collected them from his closet, knowing that it was the right thing to do. </div>
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We had bought them in advance. He never lived to wear them.</div>
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Others needed shoes, but didn't have the money to buy them.</div>
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It all made sense...came full circle...</div>
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Rowan would be so proud, no...WAS so proud.</div>
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Then, I brought another very VERY special pair tennis shoes.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOj_uOouUIiijWioEJK-WkDtsqFDIj7eIt4OhQsVR88r30a7u955rVkoy8wL6z8-ERmzkk13zP6KRMhDAGjeOr1t2dnXMaT9EUV2I6TPr-PphLLNL3ip7QxiAbilRRt4tfZyHtkQP0qt8/s1600/IMG_4873.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOj_uOouUIiijWioEJK-WkDtsqFDIj7eIt4OhQsVR88r30a7u955rVkoy8wL6z8-ERmzkk13zP6KRMhDAGjeOr1t2dnXMaT9EUV2I6TPr-PphLLNL3ip7QxiAbilRRt4tfZyHtkQP0qt8/s320/IMG_4873.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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While Rowan was hospitalized during his 2 transplants in Seattle, Russell Wilson from the Seattle Sea Hawks gifted a brand new pair of Nike tennis shoes to EACH child in the hospital at the time. Yes, you heard me...EACH child!</div>
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Rowan was in ICU on dialysis, much too ill to receive the shoes, but Child Life had asked me to come get some in his size that day. I did. I even passed Russel Wilson during his live feed, in the elevator, on my way back to Rowan's room. I thanked him, with tears in my eyes...knowing at that moment that Rowan might never even know he received these shoes, let alone wear them...but still I thanked him.</div>
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Rowan did get well enough to at least open the shoes, and to record a thank you video for Russell Wilson. He never got out of bed again though, never walked again. never wore them. They have been sitting in the same shoe box in his bedroom at home in Texas, since... since, he died.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsqmVhYQsFRdQhxoBNhbyHy4BIcypsjdItXe6sL2T_dssTr7XoI9o1Na5DbuWhDER-fLkg0H8coyXvS7fawjGpoCh1TfmyJCQfhl7wCLsnD4hkwYjxxSwpQF8SFotajjQwQS25fyDqRuM/s1600/IMG_4871.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsqmVhYQsFRdQhxoBNhbyHy4BIcypsjdItXe6sL2T_dssTr7XoI9o1Na5DbuWhDER-fLkg0H8coyXvS7fawjGpoCh1TfmyJCQfhl7wCLsnD4hkwYjxxSwpQF8SFotajjQwQS25fyDqRuM/s320/IMG_4871.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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I couldn't think of a better reason to pass them on.</div>
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Rowan would want them to be a part of Dusti's shoe fundraiser...no doubt.</div>
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I also went to Macy's and bought 10 pair of shoes for girls and boys, of all ages, infant through middle school.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOb0Njb6LHRuMp03eS-UmdV9pCvfzE4qMN76dPQpIvF-SiAiyEBqnQX4eWqDLOX9m1VCIWRowkQqSAJFX5WOlxPz6Rug8OxwaZCrRxatvab_7KufxM2kn00gpiVRckJ5YfPADpHw3uEBg/s1600/IMG_4874.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOb0Njb6LHRuMp03eS-UmdV9pCvfzE4qMN76dPQpIvF-SiAiyEBqnQX4eWqDLOX9m1VCIWRowkQqSAJFX5WOlxPz6Rug8OxwaZCrRxatvab_7KufxM2kn00gpiVRckJ5YfPADpHw3uEBg/s320/IMG_4874.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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I presented Dusti with these 14 pair of shoes...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwsK8B2EZEIOhDxEDZ3GGtRvpq0fxugakdeEhkoJFUPgWrpWD8kQILSHcUeFpKIlXJ_vrMtgqSS_rdI77RQuh8U_raK_rm-XZh_vaf8kqZ-IxptsBzfqJgOFoJ7-xxhpvFAvGTTUG1jM0/s1600/IMG_5031.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwsK8B2EZEIOhDxEDZ3GGtRvpq0fxugakdeEhkoJFUPgWrpWD8kQILSHcUeFpKIlXJ_vrMtgqSS_rdI77RQuh8U_raK_rm-XZh_vaf8kqZ-IxptsBzfqJgOFoJ7-xxhpvFAvGTTUG1jM0/s400/IMG_5031.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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and of course we both cried...</div>
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but I think they were tears of joy too.</div>
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I also gave her a precious stuffed dog with Rowan's name on it. It was one that a friend of mine had gifted Rowan. He loved it so. But it has sat in his bedroom, lonely, in the dark, for well over a year. Who better to own it now than his sweet friend who volunteers at the shelter, who helped him with the dog run, etc. It just made sense.</div>
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I had to leave the event early, but heard later how successful it was overall.</div>
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So proud of the work you are doing Dusti!</div>
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Ironically, or not, the event location happened to be less than 4 miles from Rowan's resting place. Before heading to the event, I stopped by to sit at Rowan's grave and talk to him. I also went back again after I left Dusti's event.</div>
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The Iron Man that has laid next to Rowan's gravesite for well over a year, was actually laid there by Dusti herself. I wipe it down and replace it every week when I clean up his site.</div>
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This was my view as I finally left the event, and the cemetery, to drive home, after it all...</div>
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A rainbow...</div>
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of course...</div>
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How fitting.</div>
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I love you Dusti.</div>
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I am so proud of you...</div>
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and I know that Rowan is too...</div>
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Never forget what you told me when we talked about Rowan's life message: Love your Life!</div>
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<b><i>"I know, that's why I'm going to be ok,</i></b></div>
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<b><i>I'm always going to be ok."</i></b></div>
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Yes, Dusti, Yes, you are!</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-45810613988290219272018-10-08T19:41:00.004-07:002018-10-08T19:49:18.038-07:00"Angelina Ballerina, Bubbles, & Cake... in the hill country" : Happy 8th Birthday Olivia (2nd with Jesus)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
October 6th was Olivia's birthday. The 2nd one she has gotten to spend with Jesus in Heaven, but the 2nd one her parents and siblings have had to celebrate without her here physically.</div>
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I wasn't able to make it out to the cemetery that day (her Mom and Dad know why), but I went alone the very next day, with a special picnic planned.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi52MPL_GTKcrMyE2OEwuNuBwYKZLCB6lUFeTOZ89h_lKYepdyfASW8fCpeR56PfnC318Z-lIHMyWDBFFh-NKo-1cZfD2w3jFSCDmDSZ341-FUyb_zG-jvbfkrmQudCty6nP_sfdsqD6mE/s1600/IMG_5014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi52MPL_GTKcrMyE2OEwuNuBwYKZLCB6lUFeTOZ89h_lKYepdyfASW8fCpeR56PfnC318Z-lIHMyWDBFFh-NKo-1cZfD2w3jFSCDmDSZ341-FUyb_zG-jvbfkrmQudCty6nP_sfdsqD6mE/s400/IMG_5014.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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Her family had decorated her headstone so beautifully, with her favorite colors, pink and purple.</div>
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I had been texting her Mommy and Daddy all day the day before, as we all tried to locate a special Angelina Ballerina book. Her Mommy thought they had it, and I had ordered one just in case, but it didn't arrive in time. We both looked at 3 different stores too, but just could not find the book anywhere on her birthday.</div>
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The reason I wanted it was because the last thing I ever did with precious Olivia was watch an Angelina Ballerina video at her house with her, on one of our Wednesday visits. (Near the end, I visited her every Wednesday, and sat with her holding her hand, watching videos, offering her sips of water, and praying over her, as I let her Mommy have short little breaks to do something around the house.) I will never ever forget that last such Wednesday. I didn't know it would be the last one...but it is ingrained in my mind forever. </div>
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I wanted to read the book at Olivia's grave on her birthday... but we simply could not find it anywhere! Everything happens for a reason though, and maybe I wasn't supposed to find it. Instead, I decided to make my own special personalized Happy Birthday Olivia book, with Angelina Ballerina pictures that I could color, while I read my own words to her. So that is what I did.</div>
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I brought her pink and purple flowers...</div>
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and bubbles to blow...</div>
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and chocolate, chocolate, cake, just like the one Zoe made for her the last time Olivia was able to come to our house...</div>
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and dip n dots ice cream...</div>
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(ok, and some other "bubbles" to toast to her beautiful life;)</div>
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I sat down and stared at the blank pages of the book I had made her, and at first all I could do was cry. </div>
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Memories of every time she gave me the "I love you" sign came flooding back. We had taught her that at our house one night, when she started losing her ability to speak, so she would have a way to communicate with her beloved family. She did it so often after that:)</div>
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I reminisced about her and I comparing toe nail polish, and how excited I was when we both happened to have the same color...</div>
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And then I closed my eyes and could almost feel her tiny hand in mine again...</div>
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even on that very last day...</div>
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All of those priceless memories finally encouraged me to color the pages in the homemade book, to fill it with all the beautiful pinks and purples I could find in the box of markers.</div>
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...with a little bit of orange for Rowan of course;)</div>
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Afterward I placed the pink and purple flowers around her monument...</div>
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and blew bubbles, just as Rowan would have wanted me to do...</div>
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At one point, after I had been there about an hour, I looked up from my blanket at Olivia's grave (that is Rowan's, in the middle, straight ahead of hers), and I started to feel a little guilty for how much time I had stayed at her spot, instead of his. Then, a huge gust of wind blew through the cemetery, and I remembered what Olivia's Mommy had just said when she went to read a hippo book to Rowan recently: "there's no jealousy in heaven". And I knew she was right, that Rowan understood.</div>
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I did leave him 2 of her pink flowers, and kissed his marker, and told him I loved him.</div>
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But that day, that day was Olivia's day...</div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">my little Angelina Ballerina...</span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike></div>
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Happy 8th Birthday Olivia!</div>
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Your Mommy, Daddy, CJ and Alyssa love and miss you so much... as do I,</div>
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but I'm sure Rowan and his other angel friends helped you celebrate with Jesus... big time!</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-53729160055202560192018-10-06T21:56:00.003-07:002018-10-06T21:56:50.258-07:00Charlotte, "Because I knew you, I have been changed for the good." ~Wicked 2018 @ Majestic Theater<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This smile...on this girl... makes my heart skip a beat.</div>
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I had the distinct honor and pleasure of surprising Ms. Charlotte, my best little friend, with a special date today. I took her to see her first Broadway performance at the Majestic Theater (one of Rowan's bucket list items). We went to see Wicked...</div>
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and it was awesome!</div>
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As soon as we started to walk up to the theater Charlotte said "It's so fancy! Either everyone is over-dressed, or I didn't know it would be this fancy. Am I dressed okay?" </div>
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I of course told her she was dressed perfectly.</div>
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I told her that one of Zoe's Highschool classmates was actually in this play, and she made sure to find his name on the cast board. Congratulations on your success Andy!</div>
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The stage was amazing!</div>
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Charlotte was blown away.</div>
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The last time I was in a theater with her was when I took her and Rowan to see Charlotte's Web at the Magik Theater. They LOVED that so much...but this theater, she was in pure awe...</div>
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She even looked up and said "Is that where like Kings and Queens sit? Wow!"</div>
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I obviously did not take any photos during the show, but she sat wide eyed and amazed for 3+ hours (with a quick intermission of course for a restroom break:) She told me thank you so many times.</div>
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Then she clapped fiercely and cheered loudlyfor the cast during final bows, standing on her tippy toes so she could see them all.</div>
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It was so rewarding to experience this with her.</div>
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Zoe and I saw Wicked there at the Magestic Theater many years ago as well, so it brought back a lot of memories.</div>
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Glinda and Elphaba!</div>
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Charlotte loved how "pun-ny" they were:)</div>
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After the show Charlotte and I walked across the street and had dinner at a hotel bistro on the streets of San Antonio, and the fun continued...</div>
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She decided that she should drink her water "more fancy-like" since it was in a fancy wine glass. (This was such a Rowan thing to do too:)</div>
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Charlotte thoroughly enjoyed her pepperoni pizza and fresh berries, and even noted: "wow, flat bread, so my pizza is fancy too."</div>
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My absolute favorite part of the night was this though... a pinky promise that Charlotte and I made...and if you know anything at all, you know that pinky promises should never be broken (per Rowan).</div>
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I asked Charlotte if she would like to go to another show sometime? And she said "YES!". I told her that I would take her every year that I could possibly do so, for the rest of my life if she wanted to. She nodded yes but then started laughing and said "Something tells me you won't be able to bring me to the theater when you're 99 though." So I said, "Well, then you'll bring me!" She laughed and laughed. We both did, almost until we cried. </div>
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Then we made a pinky promise. We agreed, that I would take her until I couldn't anymore, and then she would start taking me.</div>
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(*side note: Charlotte guesses that I will be able to take her until I'm 90 (which is in 43 years). She figured out herself that she will be 53 years old then (she's 10 now). I told her we might need to be flexible on that, because she might need to start taking me sooner, and she said "Ok, sure, whenever you need me to, it'll be my turn.")</div>
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Deal sweetheart. Deal.</div>
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Pinky promise.</div>
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After dinner we skipped, laughed, and took selfies the whole way back to the parking garage.</div>
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Once back at the car, she thanked me again, and apologized if she was underdressed. I told her to stop apologizing, but then promptly apologized if I sang "Defying Gravity" the whole way home. She said "that's okay, go ahead."</div>
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I love you my sweet, sweet Charlotte. </div>
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I really miss taking you and Rowan on adventures together, but I still thank God every day for every moment I get to spend time with you. </div>
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You remind me so much of him. You were two peas in a pod. Your sense of humor, your flair for the dramatic, your laugh, the way you both know/knew when I was about to cry...the way your smile makes me take pause, brings me joy, changes me...</div>
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<b>"I've heard it said </b></div>
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<b>that people come into our lives for a reason</b></div>
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<b>bringing something we must learn</b></div>
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<b>And we are led</b></div>
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<b>to those who help us most to grow</b></div>
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<b>if we let them</b></div>
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<b>Because I knew you, I have been changed for the good."</b></div>
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<i>Glinda</i></div>
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Can't wait for our next "Broadway play-date" Charlotte, and for the 43-52+ more after that:)</div>
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<i><span style="background-color: yellow;">;) pinky promise</span></i></div>
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<i></i><br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-72193956978800469262018-09-29T21:22:00.003-07:002018-09-29T21:30:03.462-07:00"Two Hippos up on sticks"...and other stories from the cemetery...<div style="text-align: center;">
This beautiful cemetery in the Texas Hill Country is where Rowan's earthly body is laid to rest, alongside many others, including some of his special young friends. </div>
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As fellow angel Moms and Dads, we sometimes visit each others children's graves when we visit our own. We pray for them, we cry for them, we leave flowers or little treasures for them. Today though, today, one special angel Mom did something extra. Olivia's Mom went to visit our babies, who lay just 10 feet away from one another, </div>
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and she read Rowan a story. It's not the first time she's done that, but today was a little different. </div>
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Today she read <b>"<u>Two Hippos up on sticks</u>"</b> to Rowan. </div>
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As she admitted on the video she sent me, "This may be too babyish Rowan, but it's hippos, so I couldn't resist." She was right. Hippos were Rowan's all time favorite animal. He loved everything hippo related. He even got to hand-feed the hippos at the zoo behind the scenes once. </div>
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Yes, Rowan was surely smiling down from heaven as he watched Vivian there at the cemetery today, as he listened to her read this sweet book. But when I watched the video, again and again today, and listened to her read the book to Rowan, I was awestruck for more reasons than just the hippos referenced in the title.</div>
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Yes, there were 2 <b>Hippos</b> up on sticks... (From toddler to ten years old, hippos were Rowan's favorite animal. We had so many sets of stuffed hippo twins, so that if he and I were ever apart, we would each have the same hippo to snuggle with. He did the same with his home nurse Cindy while he was in Seattle.)</div>
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But there were also 4 Fish drinking <b>Lemonade</b>... (Think of all the money Rowan raised to help others selling his ginger lemonade over the years... over $20,000 :)</div>
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10 <b>Butterflies</b>... (I see orange butterflies everywhere since Rowan passed away <i>(and not just these past few weeks during butterfly-ageddon in South Texas)</i>, and he always said that butterflies were his angel friends when he was still alive)</div>
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the <b>Orange fox</b>... (His favorite color-Orange, "Fantastic Mr. Fox"-one of his favorite movies, and Brian and I have had a fox visit us many times since Rowan passed, both at home and away.) </div>
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<b>Green froggy</b>... (Rowan was buried with his very own "Green frog Jr." wubby, the special toy he held in his hand during every surgery and hospitalization, and I kept his twin, the original, "OG. Green frog" wubby, and sleep with it every single night.)</div>
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So many signs, so many memories, so much love felt from Vivian's act of kindness today. </div>
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Thank you for being there today Vivian, not just for our babies, Olivia and Rowan, but also for me. Your "well check" today- bringing me coffee and tissues to the house (since you didn't run in to me at the cemetery)... such a blessing. You reading to Rowan, let alone sending me video of the whole story...priceless. Your friendship... beyond measure.</div>
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<i>Adversity, need, trouble</i>...we have both seen our share.</div>
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<i>Love</i>...we have always shown each other.</div>
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Calls to mind-</div>
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<b><i>Proverbs 17:17</i></b></div>
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<b><i>~~~</i></b></div>
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I thank God for your friendship. </div>
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I thank you for loving my son, as I have loved your daughter...</div>
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both on Earth and in Heaven.</div>
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Our families will forever be intertwined.</div>
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Our losses, have joined our hearts for eternity.</div>
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In a way,</div>
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we ourselves are...</div>
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"<b>two hippos up on sticks</b>".</div>
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Love, Carebear</div>
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In loving memory of Rowan and Olivia:</div>
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(***<i>yes, they are indeed healed</i>***)</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-37549067553029581252018-07-21T00:36:00.001-07:002018-07-21T00:47:15.727-07:00"The Ferris Wheel"<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><u><span style="font-size: large;">"The Ferris Wheel"</span></u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVashBVyEiM9jJuLC-VKHLDc1Ysl_7fhVcuUjJxNs5rtrowY5JOlsUX4EffOx6Lq1eO0uU5Ix9N8QHM-MYvkxC8DY1n8zPNjWJRD8Q3a8KbvE89kUaPKjYw_7lfn5ZStVhsAsuGeDnZKk/s1600/IMG_3044.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVashBVyEiM9jJuLC-VKHLDc1Ysl_7fhVcuUjJxNs5rtrowY5JOlsUX4EffOx6Lq1eO0uU5Ix9N8QHM-MYvkxC8DY1n8zPNjWJRD8Q3a8KbvE89kUaPKjYw_7lfn5ZStVhsAsuGeDnZKk/s400/IMG_3044.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've stared at this Ferris Wheel for hours, moments, days...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>feels like years</i>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I never wanted to get on,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">but I wasn't given a choice.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know it will go up, but I also realize it will come down...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">slowly...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">painfully slowly.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The view must be beautiful,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">so beautiful it will hurt.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I won't be able to breathe...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'll barely be able to see...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'll want it to come off it's hinges,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">to roll slowly into the water...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">to sink into silence.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBj-5B_21ORJw9dBI1xaQO2cXMMlAClQ7iuNQ083xfEf6RocvYqp3NnJwcIzNc2JtJdExGB1kgcbaubgLfVVzOsGASBNOxRcsfaKKvOwX11pmOCkbUU8FhxJ40fTVYGF43_sjCsr0HyqM/s1600/IMG_3048.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBj-5B_21ORJw9dBI1xaQO2cXMMlAClQ7iuNQ083xfEf6RocvYqp3NnJwcIzNc2JtJdExGB1kgcbaubgLfVVzOsGASBNOxRcsfaKKvOwX11pmOCkbUU8FhxJ40fTVYGF43_sjCsr0HyqM/s400/IMG_3048.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim31jiQjEU_Remh0AzTo0_kV3fN8ucsYHqDuRo_UAQt39X-16jMZ8lTTAW4ABG6B7ui2GSEQCrX5XAHRfF0LzrVe2S4yc8PMx2Cvh-HUYrmObwgEu3rT7Awey4SZ6jAo5a3DIPJCGcke4/s1600/IMG_3058.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim31jiQjEU_Remh0AzTo0_kV3fN8ucsYHqDuRo_UAQt39X-16jMZ8lTTAW4ABG6B7ui2GSEQCrX5XAHRfF0LzrVe2S4yc8PMx2Cvh-HUYrmObwgEu3rT7Awey4SZ6jAo5a3DIPJCGcke4/s400/IMG_3058.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One car at a time,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">one click at a time,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">one moment at a time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it won't do me that favor.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It can't.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How many cars are there?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">How many times will it go around?</span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How many clicks until I can get off?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't tell.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I don't know.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It seems like an eternity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is it really as slow as it looks...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, it is.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The fear doesn't go away.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The sadness never ends.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The view just changes (but only a little).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Car by car,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">click by click,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">moment by moment,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">slowly...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">painfully.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Who knew? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Who knew that a glorious fantastical ride could cause this much pain.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If my only choices were to never get on, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">or never be able to get off...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess I'd choose the ride.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">************</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm on the Ferris Wheel now.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm on it...alone.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9VI6S1wvLpJghKZQjVdA7l0Y_kngNz5_VLcGAO5-SH-BB6OxlFYNy320GANCQ_ZA9tH2Ztk2JncPwcavgzdpQecxVP2zyXJDWvSciKTDXy_HTgH506o43CxpvFx_LmWcxn_Bfa8uPKtY/s1600/IMG_3052.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9VI6S1wvLpJghKZQjVdA7l0Y_kngNz5_VLcGAO5-SH-BB6OxlFYNy320GANCQ_ZA9tH2Ztk2JncPwcavgzdpQecxVP2zyXJDWvSciKTDXy_HTgH506o43CxpvFx_LmWcxn_Bfa8uPKtY/s400/IMG_3052.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm crying,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">or it's raining.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't tell which.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe both.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe the whole world is crying.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe just me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It stops at the top.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh God.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Please help me God.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I see everything.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgifsEOIirpE7iXlN8sv6H97o6xZknEv1w2m9VKDYNcIU-aKhJlDPlyXcVAjSosIXWhX5BLrtHkV9aFG-ywY-DC4n_zmx7Sesjri0xSFq6Kz38ESj5lksVa9b2xthen0WW_JsuDcfr8WB4/s1600/IMG_3056.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgifsEOIirpE7iXlN8sv6H97o6xZknEv1w2m9VKDYNcIU-aKhJlDPlyXcVAjSosIXWhX5BLrtHkV9aFG-ywY-DC4n_zmx7Sesjri0xSFq6Kz38ESj5lksVa9b2xthen0WW_JsuDcfr8WB4/s400/IMG_3056.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yet, I see nothing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The car rocks gently,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">then harder with my sobs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't control it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't make it stop.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the tears...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the rocking...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the ride...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I want it to start moving again,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">but I also don't.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I just want down.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I just want off.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I just want out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I snap pictures quickly.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Maybe I'll be able to look at them,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and not feel terrified.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe they'll look beautiful...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">someday.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Until then,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">all I can do is hold on</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and breathe.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One tick at a time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One car at a time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">one moment...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">at a time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Ferris Wheel of grief.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">written by </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(and ridden by) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Carrie Windham </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7/20/2018</span></div>
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<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-4467980082725259072018-06-27T20:18:00.002-07:002018-06-27T20:18:29.979-07:00"Flip Flops-part 2": Rowan reminds me to look for the signs...in the sand, at the beach, all around me...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I spent the past couple days at the beach in Rockport, Texas. It's the first time I've been able to go to a beach for two years. I couldn't go back to South Padre Island yet... that was the last beach Rowan was ever on, just before we left for transplant two years ago. But even going back to Rockport, or any beach for that matter, was difficult. Rowan probably stepped foot on sand fewer than ten times in his life, and he wasn't able to enjoy the ocean depths like most of us can (we had to keep his central line out of oceans, rivers and lakes due to infection risks)...but boy did he LOVE being there when he could. He'd skip in the shore up to his knees, run away from the tide, laughing and screaming, build sand castles, write messages to his angel friends in the sand, raise his arms to the sky, soaking up the sun and the breeze, thanking God...loving his life. It was a sight to behold. The ocean is already a miraculous sight to behold... but watching Rowan there...there just aren't words. So few times, yet so many memories, and so much joy.</div>
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I almost didn't go this week. I didn't think I could. But I went anyway. I reminded myself how much Rowan loved it. I tried not to dwell on how sad I was that he wasn't there with me this time. </div>
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See, the beach has had a lot of symbolism for us over the years. Rowan saw so many signs at the beach in his short life, on his limited visits. He had multiple dreams and visions of his angel friends at the beach too, and he gave messages to their mommies from them.</div>
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The first time he had me write "I miss you Chrissie" in the sand, a rainbow came out shortly afterwards and he cried tears of joy, with his arms up to the sky, saying "She loves it Mommy!" He even told me, "I'm hugging her and it feels pretty." He was barely 4 years old.</div>
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A few years later, he dreamed about Natalie, watching over his younger angel friends in heaven, and he told me that she was the only one wearing shoes. He said they were flip flops. Later we learned that her grave (in Florida) had flip flops engraved on it, and that her mom still had a pair of her flip flops near the door where she had last kicked them off before she died suddenly in a tragic accident. He painted a picture for her Mom years ago, of Natalie's flip flops on the sand at a beach, in front of a beautiful sunrise.</div>
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Rowan also had a dream about sweet Avery, holding her baby brother, and said that her brother was holding a baby boy or girl too. He explained that he wasn't sure if Carter was holding a boy or a girl, that God didn't exactly show him clearly, so he painted a picture to describe it. He painted a larger pink heart (Avery), with a smaller blue heart (Carter) on top of it, and then another heart that was half blue and half pink on top of that one. They were all on a sandy beach in front of a sunrise. He used his thumbprints and pinky prints to make each heart. After we sent the painting and explanation to Avery's parents, they called to tell me just how meaningful it actually was. They were pregnant with twins, a boy and a girl...no one knew yet...but somehow, Rowan painted it.</div>
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So you see, beaches have always been special in Rowan's life. He saw signs there. He felt the presence of angels there. God was there. This week I hoped I would see some signs too. I needed to, I really needed to. And I did, oh boy did I...</div>
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First of all, moments before I locked the door to the house to leave, I suddenly remembered a gift I had received. Over a year ago, sometime shortly after Rowan passed away, Natalie's mom sent me special flip flops...VERY special flip flops. I hadn't dreamed of being able to go back to a beach yet, so I had them tucked away in my closet...for over a year! but I ran upstairs, and found them immediately. It was meant to be. I threw them in the car and headed south.</div>
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It's one of the first things I did when I got there...I walked alone down to the sandy shore, tears in my eyes, talking to Rowan, wearing the special flip flops, remembering how much he loved the beach. They were precious! They left perfect imprints in the wet sand. I stepped again and again, crying tears of joy each time I lifted my feet up to take another step. They are truly a gift that just keeps giving. One foot in front of the other is all I have been able to manage for a year and a half, but these flip flops were reminders, that with each one of those steps, his mark on this world continues... </div>
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"Rowan"</div>
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"Love your Life"</div>
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… not just imprints in the sand, but in the hearts of so many.</div>
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Pam, I cannot thank you enough. As I told you, at first I was going to say, "You have no idea how much these mean to me", but then I remembered... you do, you honestly, truly do. You lost a child as well. Your angel now watches over Rowan and all of his angel friends, just as he described to me years ago... wearing flip flops in heaven. </div>
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Flip flops are synonymous with Natalie to me, just as they were to Rowan. I felt a little bit of heaven this week because of you, because of these priceless flip flops. Now they will forever remind me of our both of our angels. They left this world too soon for our hearts, but their footprints are forever imprinted in our souls, and in the hearts of others as well.</div>
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Thank you Pam, Natalie, Rowan, God,</div>
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from the bottom of my heart </div>
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and the soles of my awesome flip flops.</div>
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Rowan kept the signs coming while I was there at the beach in Rockport, bringing a smile to face and tears to my eyes many times in just 2 days.</div>
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As I walked the pier, these were both tied to a post... both orange... both God-winks...</div>
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As I drove back to the cottage from the beach, I saw this street sign...and when I looked at my photos later that night, I realized that it was an orange house on the corner of that street... so Rowan.</div>
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Then, this heart in the middle of the rocks, under the water. Rowan found hearts everywhere! Another God-wink.</div>
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Finally, (and I may be the only one who sees this, but I don't mind), some more orange caught my eye as I walked barefoot on the rocks near the water...</div>
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And later, while looking at and enlarging the photo, I noticed even more as I zoomed in on the orange spots...</div>
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Just above the orange area, I see a handprint under the water, with another heart on the outside edge of the palm... it's like he was waving at me:)</div>
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And finally, if you enlarge just the orange spot on the rocks, I see a hippo, facing left, mouth wide open... Rowan's favorite animal:)</div>
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As I said, I may be the only one who sees these particular signs, but that's ok. I am the one looking for them, I am the one taking the time to notice them, and I must be the one who needed them. </div>
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Rowan always told us, "there are signs everywhere, you just have to take the time to look for them". This week, I did.</div>
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Thank you for the reminders Rowan, thank you for the beauty of the ocean God, and thank you Cindy and Duane for the use of your cottage. It did my soul good.</div>
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I love you and I miss you Rowan, but I am keeping my eyes, ears and heart open baby.</div>
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560 days with Jesus...</div>
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I'm one day closer Rowan.</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-8967261195560945762018-06-12T21:19:00.001-07:002018-06-12T21:19:03.047-07:00More than cereal...it was about perspective...thank you Rowan, and thank you to all of our heroes!<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Friday was the end of the 2018 Rowan Windham Memorial
Cereal Drive at Methodist Children's Hospital, </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">benefiting the San Antonio Food Bank,
as part of the National Cereal Drive and the Million Summer Meals for Kids</span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">. However, it was about WAY more than cereal...it was
about perspective, which if you knew Rowan...makes perfect sense.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuZo68fwwhsqXN2KSMr9HuFqSqXhyphenhyphenEds9jn0GUJYYvB9CrVGZcSdXP07cTeR0gWjg2CZRkeYCoQMepcfI9S7wxfJBiWE3wJTqx8AHkxyltQ81GLajucraMxpzTG6zo_VRWx9rEiVQlTrc/s1600/IMG_2138+%25281%2529.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuZo68fwwhsqXN2KSMr9HuFqSqXhyphenhyphenEds9jn0GUJYYvB9CrVGZcSdXP07cTeR0gWjg2CZRkeYCoQMepcfI9S7wxfJBiWE3wJTqx8AHkxyltQ81GLajucraMxpzTG6zo_VRWx9rEiVQlTrc/s320/IMG_2138+%25281%2529.JPG" width="320" /></a><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">The number one thing I have heard from people since his
death is that Rowan helped people with their perspective, that they learned not
to complain about their problems because of him and his outlook on life.
The same is true for me. his mother. </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Don't get me wrong...there is absolutely nothing worse than
losing a child (at least not that I have experienced or can imagine). Now
remember, I lost my own mother 3 weeks to the day that Rowan died, suddenly and
unexpectedly. It was the worst day of my life...until I lost my
son. A few times I questioned whether I should voice that, wondering if
people would think less of me, or think that I wasn't sad about losing my
Mom. That is just not the case though. I was devastated...like fall
to your knees in shock crying, when my family called me from Ohio to tell me my
Mom was gone. But the thing is, I fell to my knees next to my own child's
PICU bed. When I felt guilty about not being able to attend her funeral
(think about that...I could not go to my own mothers funeral!). I was
more than 2000 miles away, Rowan was critically ill, post transplant number
two, on dialysis... how could I leave him? And when I asked myself that
question I realized, my Mom would have NEVER left my side, EVER. I had my
answer. I had perspective.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">The cereal drive gave me perspective this year too.
Rowan never ate a bowl of cereal in his life, yet we continue to collect cereal
for thousands of children in his name each year. Then, Michael Guerra
from the San Antonio food Bank shared with us that there are children in our
community who actually fail classes on purpose, just so they can attend Summer
school and be assured breakfast and lunch each day. Can you imagine?
Failing school, forgoing your Summer break, going to school all Summer, just so
you can eat. That is the definition of food insecurity, and it is a real
problem. Hopefully, we can end it. It won't be in Rowan's lifetime,
like he hoped...but maybe it will be in ours.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> <span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">When Ian and I arrived at Methodist Children's Hospital
this past Friday, with our final load of cereal donations, we were shocked (in
a good way:). The lobby was filled with the most beautiful assortment of
colorful cereal boxes you have ever seen...tons of them! I immediately
smiled and said to myself "we got this Rowan", and I just knew that
the goal had been hit...just not how far it had been blown out of the water.</span><br />
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We were given our shirts for this year, which were awesome!</div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">This year, a new event was added to reveal day,
"Rowan's Breakfast of Champions". I cried when I saw the
banner hanging from the table.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> It was to honor heroes in our community, both children and
adults. It was inspired by Rowan's legacy of "making the
good". I knew about it, but did not realize how profound it would
be. The set up was perfect. There was a head table for our adult
heroes, and 3 surrounding tables for 6 children who were impacting the world in
a positive way too. Ian was one of the members on the youth panel, being
recognized for the way he has excelled personally and academically, all while
continuing to help his little brother's legacy live on in so many ways (Be the
Match, Rowan Windham Memorial Cereal Drive, Rowan Jameson Windham
Foundation).<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>I could not be prouder of
him.</span></div>
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They had a special sign marking my spot at the table too...so sweet:)</div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">The 3 adult champions were Frank Wilson (Head Coach of the
UTSA Football Team), Matt Bonner (Former San Antonio Spurs Player), and Manny
Diote (Founder of Ferarri Kids). </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; float: none; margin: 0px; orphans: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; float: none; margin: 0px; orphans: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; float: none; margin: 0px; orphans: 2; word-spacing: 0px;">The children asked each of the adults questions
about how their personal experiences helped inspire them and how they made it
through tough times. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">These 3 men were such amazing encouragers,
and gave wonderful advice to the youth, as well as to the crowd. They
talked about perseverance, strength, and giving back to your community.
At the end of the session, I was able to thank them all for participating, and
gave them each one of Rowan's bracelets. I was very emotional. <span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>I explained that I missed Rowan so very much,
but that I could see him all around that table that day. I saw him in
each of them, and in all the good they were making. It was a special
moment...an event that I hope they continue to include in this cereal drive.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">We had a photo opportunity afterwards, before heading
downstairs for the final cereal total reveal.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>Thank you Manny, Coach Wilson and Matt.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>You were a great addition to our special day, and tremendous assets to our
community.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Thank you to the SA Spurs for posting about the event later that evening too.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">The cereal drive press conference was overwhelmingly
powerful as well. Robert Lenza, CEO of Methodist Children's Hospital, gave the
history of the drive, and explained how Rowan came to be involved. Then
they showed a very emotional video of Rowan over the years at MCH. It was
narrated with a letter written by one of Rowan's long time favorite PICU
nurses, Trudy. The way she explained his compassion was beautiful.
I cried my eyes out. He was such a beautiful child, with a heart of
gold. They captured his spirit perfectly. </span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Thank you Mr. Lenza for allowing my boy's legacy to live on
through your staff and this event. Thank you to Captain Cereal, Greg, for
holding me up as I wept in front of the crowd throughout the video. Thank
you Trudy, for caring for Rowan over the years, and for explaining his
compassionate way so beautifully. Thank you Nichelle for bring me the
napkin so I could wipe the tears from my eyes. Thank you Stacy and
Veronica for your obvious labor of love, which I realize involves a lot of
labor, but is also extremely full of love.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>Thank you Cheri for helping promote this drive, and for the addition of
the very special Rowan’s Breakfast of Champions.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>Thank you to ever member of the hospital
staff who helped make this cereal drive successful once again this year, and
for everything you do to help families and patients like ourselves every day.</span></div>
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What an amazing group of people. Everyone pulled together to help wrap the pallets of cereal and load those trucks...SA Food Bank staff, nurses, doctors, and other hospital staff, Ian and I, members of Gencure's staff, and even children of hospital staff members. It was truly a sight to behold. Awesome teamwork.</div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> <span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span></span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Drumroll please…</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">During the press conference, Mr. Lenza announced that we
had met and exceeded this year’s goal of 150,000.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>The total was already over 190,000 servings
at that point! </span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Then, while dozens of us were loading up 3 SA Food Bank trucks,
even more cereal continued to be dropped off outside, and more texts came in
regarding cereal totals that were on their way.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>So, in the end this year’s total ends up being:</span><br />
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u>200,000 </u></span></b></span></div>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u>servings of cereal!</u></span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u><br /></u></span></b></span>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u><br /></u></span></b></span>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">The overall hospital winners were:</span><br />
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Division Winner</span></b><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">- Advanced Clinicals/IT&S Team: 77,892 servings</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Unit Winner</span></b><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">- Pedi Surgical: 12,299 servings</span></div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Congratulations to all!</span><br />
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Look at these hats that they made! So adorable.</span></div>
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">I also want to thank everyone who helped us grow Rowan’s
individual memorial donation amount…</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Judy & Caleb Windham</span></div>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Cindy & Duane Buethe</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Yahan Xie, Classmates & Friends</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Jen Salinas, Tamika Haley & Friends</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Locastro Family</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Terry Galbraith</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Colleen Krupp</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Tessa & Jaxon</span><br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Ogles/Doucettes</span><br />
<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Including all of the awesome businesses that agreed to be cereal
collection stations on Rowan’s behalf…</span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Woodlawn Theater</span></div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh18776m8EU0Du9D16Djt6LRIOQF4B3E8p8AMqLZzjay1HxfxlCK_00eEq42EA3ujDvHMDZNrV9wAXl5DxlxC3TLrmXVzJNx5zrl4U-KVThE78sP5NiahOtNpPE8VcdOU95BNaxb-7PMTc/s1600/IMG_2095.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh18776m8EU0Du9D16Djt6LRIOQF4B3E8p8AMqLZzjay1HxfxlCK_00eEq42EA3ujDvHMDZNrV9wAXl5DxlxC3TLrmXVzJNx5zrl4U-KVThE78sP5NiahOtNpPE8VcdOU95BNaxb-7PMTc/s400/IMG_2095.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Keller Williams Cityview</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm8-aK2bhzLndqd1M9DcMPkG1NRbB2qpC_OFaX-fOf2ZoZ_-4UBO9R5V2-LdJo7nhz_H9zGY9eepY8MkCx3Zh5YGzAL3Lxjcbu15lJem3ZSDN0Fjv2ApsnAK7i6YrJXbjGlolzA4tHTHI/s1600/IMG_2232.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="795" data-original-width="632" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm8-aK2bhzLndqd1M9DcMPkG1NRbB2qpC_OFaX-fOf2ZoZ_-4UBO9R5V2-LdJo7nhz_H9zGY9eepY8MkCx3Zh5YGzAL3Lxjcbu15lJem3ZSDN0Fjv2ApsnAK7i6YrJXbjGlolzA4tHTHI/s400/IMG_2232.PNG" width="317" /></a></div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> </span><span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Gencure/South Texas Blood & Tissue Center locations</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1wNWF5w_d0BpFnxlUMHcuzgqCXFBamWjyvZsCGCXoipyZzsG74nWkcUgcyeJ3U4x6TUqUh1yHT0xJD1di5RLkYP-ikjtoAjnEO70P16R-9KC96xmEL946zxotx-Urg5pzGUiXMbGgAYw/s1600/IMG_2180.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1wNWF5w_d0BpFnxlUMHcuzgqCXFBamWjyvZsCGCXoipyZzsG74nWkcUgcyeJ3U4x6TUqUh1yHT0xJD1di5RLkYP-ikjtoAjnEO70P16R-9KC96xmEL946zxotx-Urg5pzGUiXMbGgAYw/s400/IMG_2180.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<i>(they had even more cereal delivered during the event, so their contribution was even higher than this:)</i><br />
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<br /></div>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Poke Planet</span><br />
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEht9oD6Pbuk68SXQ9SaIXU_38UlR6er1dRP2eBu_zcCmhh_dSXCZLysd_rKF6O3gB2ZiZm6D8cRKhcdorwVkSvUczpGPi7Mxc42lyykgXxNHawKFeZp2z6Ulq215Sh_AVXvYK3-_UHBano/s1600/IMG_2195.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="959" data-original-width="876" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEht9oD6Pbuk68SXQ9SaIXU_38UlR6er1dRP2eBu_zcCmhh_dSXCZLysd_rKF6O3gB2ZiZm6D8cRKhcdorwVkSvUczpGPi7Mxc42lyykgXxNHawKFeZp2z6Ulq215Sh_AVXvYK3-_UHBano/s400/IMG_2195.JPG" width="365" /></a></span></div>
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<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Copa Wine Bar</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh2UOzUa5wk9KmchO4X5iIfeGXGIb3s0SLols0thT8Nk_a6wDTcOJrU-Q7rhci56Dm7Li42i9FmjUchEtlJ_L0nWgzcS269L2hOCCFBNZMAeC7E7u6cwl4QlT2k0xUQOdKRvy23cLv110/s1600/IMG_2107.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh2UOzUa5wk9KmchO4X5iIfeGXGIb3s0SLols0thT8Nk_a6wDTcOJrU-Q7rhci56Dm7Li42i9FmjUchEtlJ_L0nWgzcS269L2hOCCFBNZMAeC7E7u6cwl4QlT2k0xUQOdKRvy23cLv110/s400/IMG_2107.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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&<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Comal Drug</span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">in New Braunfels</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Together, along with our own purchases of cereal, you all
helped us deliver <b>9061</b> servings on Rowan’s behalf.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>That is nearly 3 times the amount he
collected that first year from his hospital room, and it put him next in line
this year, right behind the division and unit winners, ahead of all the other
units of the hospital!<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>It was a group
effort for sure, and we are so grateful to you all.</span></div>
<br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span> </span><br />
<br />
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
One of t<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">he most powerful moments of the day Friday was when Michael
Guerra, from the SA Food Bank, with tears in his eyes, said that because of
Rowan’s legacy, he was hopeful that San Antonio just may be one of the first
cities to end Summer childhood hunger.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>What a beautiful day that will be.<span style="margin: 0px;">
</span>I hope he’s right.<span style="margin: 0px;"> Knowing Rowan's spirit, I believe he is.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">Michael, you
and the rest of the staff of the SA Food Bank are the real heroes.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>You feed the community not just in the
Summer, but throughout the year, and in times of great crisis.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>You are the hands and feet of Jesus.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>Thank you.</span></div>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEIrTCIaGezA49YYCdX0Vmb4E1odQxOAAWOmis3BPZ25ijgxb-iQ4gQUBFw4eNwh3861iXCMo3lV2FF0whbo0KCEkM9qnIKyM1fAxjS8JMm3svPHzcV2nH15wPxKtgtLOCDaO3qu5nY8I/s1600/IMG_2172.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEIrTCIaGezA49YYCdX0Vmb4E1odQxOAAWOmis3BPZ25ijgxb-iQ4gQUBFw4eNwh3861iXCMo3lV2FF0whbo0KCEkM9qnIKyM1fAxjS8JMm3svPHzcV2nH15wPxKtgtLOCDaO3qu5nY8I/s400/IMG_2172.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;"> <span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Next year’s goals have
been announced.</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">We have committed to
personally bringing in over 10,000 servings on Rowan’s behalf, and the overall
total goal for the hospital for the Rowan Windham Memorial Cereal Drive will be
225,000 servings!</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">If you, your business,
church or other group, would like to donate, or be a collection station next
Summer, message me on FB or here on the blog, or look for my posts in late
Spring announcing how you can help.</span></span><br />
<b><br /></b>
<div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<br />
<span style="color: black; margin: 0px;">I love you Rowan… your light is still shining bright down
here.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>Imagine how many children will
have breakfast because you inspired people to “make the good”!<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span></span><br />
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In memory of Rowan Jameson Windham</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-12826028952893220642018-05-28T14:14:00.001-07:002018-05-28T14:14:50.905-07:00Signs from Rowan in unexpected places... even the 2018 Culinaria Food and Wine Fest!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Some of you may know that Rowan dreamed of being a Chef one day. He couldn't eat much at all (most of his food came from g-tube or iv), but he had an incredible sense of smell, and created some fabulous recipes that only we could enjoy. He wasn't sad that he couldn't try them himself, he was just so joyful that he could make the dishes for us. When he was 8 years old, he had a bucket list item come true...he got to host a cooking demo with another Chef, Jeff Bridges, at the Culinaria Event at La Cantera Resort in San Antonio. Rowan was ecstatic! He wore his blue chef coat, his white chef hat, and gloves, and the crowd gathered as he and Jeff made both sweet and savory versions of Takoyaki (octopus fritters). Rowan told octopus jokes throughout their entire demo...it was priceless! The Culinary Institute of America in San Antonio at the Pearl, sent Rowan a certificate for culinary school while he was undergoing transplant in Seattle a few months later. He couldn't wait to come home and become a real chef. He died before that dream came to fruition. His recipes live on though, (as do his octopus jokes:), and this year, Culinaria wanted to make sure his memory lived on there too.</div>
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We met executives from Culinaria for dinner to discuss ways that his memory could be honored at the event, and were blown away by their thoughtfulness. Thank you Ginger! Rowan was but a child himself, so hosting a kids corner where the kids could have activities to do sounded perfect. There was talk of art, cooking, planting, and games. What actually developed at the event, which took place May 17th-20th, went well beyond that though. Rowan was there. His spirit was truly there. In more ways than one.</div>
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I offered to take on the children's arts and crafts portion of the event. Rowan loved art almost as he loved cooking, so I decided to create food art activities that the children could sit and do with me as their parents enjoyed wine and culinary treats nearby. It was so much fun, coming up with the projects, combining food and art. I knew Rowan would have loved to do these projects with me (some of them we had done), so I knew I had his stamp of approval. I purchased sticky boards, lentils, pasta, beans, kale, lemons, other fruits and vegetables, and gathered paper, paints, cotton balls, paper plates, tissue paper squares etc. </div>
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I prepared for 200 plus children for the weekend, what I did not prepare for was the overwhelming love and joy I shared with some of these children. My heart was deeply touched.</div>
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I also did not know to what amazing lengths Culinaria had gone to incorporate Rowan's legacy into the event. When I arrived, they directed me to the area I was to set up in...it was aptly named "Rowan's Corner", as the banner showed. </div>
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To my left was a gardening table, sponsored and manned by an amazing group of folks "Uprooted Gardens". Nick and Liz Campanella and their team were AMAZING! It took me a mere hour or so to realize just how big their hearts were, but by the end of the weekend, I knew that their mission, their dedication, and their love for all things green has so much to offer us all. And just look at what they did for Rowan... priceless.</div>
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We became friends as we worked together, side by side, that weekend. We shared lots of laughs and even some tears as I told some special Rowan stories. They helped the kids at my table when it got too busy, I handed them paper towels when they had plants spill over, they helped tape my table cloths down when the wind picked up...Rowan would have been so proud...he would have loved them all (and definitely would have flirted with all the pretty girls:).</div>
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There were lawn games set up, and a daily cooking demo for kids to participate in, following the instructions of Chef Brian West. I had bubbles for the children. Rowan's Corner was jumping with excitement, especially on Sunday. I didn't stop for a moment all day. Our tables were full of children, laughing, painting, making mosaics, planting, blowing bubbles, eating, etc. </div>
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Brian was involved, as he has been for years with this event. He sponsored and hosted multiple wine and liquor tables. I helped him with flower arrangements and decorating his rosé table. He and his volunteers worked hard all weekend, serving many fine whites, reds, rosés, bourbons and rye whiskey to the adults in the massive crowd. They were a very popular area as well:)</div>
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Several extra special things happened at the event too...<br />
signs...<br />
proof that Rowan was indeed there with us. <br />
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It got very windy that weekend. As a matter of fact it was stormy and raining all around our vicinity, but the rain held off at La Cantera until the event closed. The wind however, was in full force. It was difficult at times to keep everything on the tables. At one point, something blew off Uprooted Gardens table and brushed past me. I quickly stepped on it with my foot to prevent it from going further, then I bent down to pick it up. As I started to hand it to Liz, I glanced at it...it was Rowan's pictures staring back at me. <br />
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We both just looked at each other and got tears in our eyes...we whispered "he's here'. Later, the same piece of laminated paper, with Rowan's picture on it, flew off their table again (where it was clipped and taped to a board- as seen above), but this time it landed square against me on my chest. I took a deep breath, pulled it off my chest and smiled as I looked, yep, it was Rowan smiling at me again, and it had landed directly on my heart. I handed it to Nick, and he and I had the same exchange that Liz and I had earlier, "he's giving you signs"/"it's Rowan". It happened 3 times in all. That piece of paper could have flown anywhere around that huge resort, it could have flown away and been lost completely, but instead, it kept coming to me...right to me. Thank you Rowan. Thank you Uprooted. Thank you God.</div>
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Another priceless sign came, and while it was an awesome moment in time, I didn't realize it was a sign from Rowan until later in the day. A very special young man (around Rowan's age) spent a lot of the day with me Sunday. He must have done a dozen pieces of art. He came back to the table 5 or 6 times. He was very quiet at first, and didn't need much of my help. But with each trip back to my table, he opened up a little bit more, until he was giggling, laughing, telling me what he was naming his pictures, who he was making them for, asking for my help, etc. By the end of the afternoon, he even became my little helper, helping me get projects started for other children, and peeling the corners of the sticky board for them. He was precious! After his final trip to do art with me, he returned and stood in front of me revealing a crisp dollar bill. I said, "what is that?", and he said "it's for you". I smiled and told him thank you, but explained that I was sorry but I could not accept money, that it wasn't necessary. I hugged him and told him to keep it himself, that I enjoyed spending time with him. He reluctantly went back with the dollar, to his family. Then his grandmother came over to me and said "You need to take that dollar, he got it from his own wallet! She told me that he had said:<i> she's such a nice lady</i>." I told her I just couldn't, but that it really blessed my heart, and told her what a great boy he was. We hugged too. </div>
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I thought that was the end of that story, but it wasn't. A few hours later, Ginger from Culinaria, came to check on me and see how Rowan's Corner was going. I relayed to her all the great stories of how much fun the kids were having (even some adults:), and then shared the story of Rowan's picture blowing over to me 3 times from the Uprooted Gardens table. Then I told her about my little friend trying to pay me a dollar. </div>
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*Now Ginger essentially IS the Culinaria Food & Wine Fest (if you ask me), she organizes, orchestrates, orders, sets-up, breaks-down, etc. (of course with the help of a highly trained staff). But, this is her baby. She is deeply invested in this cause. She is the reason that Rowan's name ever was a part of it, and why it still is.</div>
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When I told Ginger about the little boy and the dollar, she started to tear up immediately. She told me that 2 years ago, after his debut cooking demo at the same event she had told Rowan that his demo was so popular, that she wanted him to come back from transplant and help fundraise for Culinaria. This year, she just wanted to honor his memory, but this was a sign that he remembered, and proof that he was indeed present. Rowan, through me, through my buddy KJ, was trying to fundraise for Culinaria, for Ginger:). What another sweet, sweet, sign, that her dream was realized, that Rowan was there again this year...if only in spirit.</div>
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Thank you to Culinaria and La Cantera Resorts for hosting this event.</div>
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Thank you to all of the sponsors, vendors, chefs, volunteers, food, wine, beer and spirits suppliers.</div>
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Thank you Ginger & Lance, for keeping our boy's legacy alive, and for all your hard work.</div>
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Thank you Uprooted Gardens for your kindness, help, heart and now...friendship!</div>
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Thank you KJ, for being such a sweet boy, while reminding me of my own sweet angel.</div>
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Thank you Rowan, for teaching me your whole life, to look for the signs...everywhere!</div>
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Lesson Learned:</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Even when the event involves wine, beer, whiskey and food for adults, </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">you can still cultivate love, fun, art, friendship and joy for kids.</span></i><br />
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<span style="font-family: georgia;">In loving memory of Chef Rowan </span><br />
<span style="font-family: georgia;">2006-2016</span></div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-6520762370735041302018-05-10T19:21:00.002-07:002018-05-10T20:13:18.648-07:00Butterflies, gardens, bubbles, theaters, paintings and tears...just another Keller Williams Red Day!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rowan was the foreman of one of Keller Williams City View's Red Day service projects in 2015. He designed and managed the installation of Jalene's Memorial Garden in her families' back yard after she passed away. He had every detail drawn out exactly as he said she would want it. It was such a beautiful day, and the garden turned out perfectly! KW named him "The Best Red Day Foreman Ever", and Jalene's family continues to use that garden to sit and remember their sweet angel.</div>
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Last year I was not able to participate, but the KW City View crew installed yet another garden, the first "Rowan Memorial Garden". This year they did the same, and the second KW Red Day Rowan Memorial Garden was planted in San Antonio at a very special location. </div>
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I'm overcome with emotions tonight, after everything I witnessed and was a part of today. I will try to get the words down, but I may need to come back tomorrow to edit this post...</div>
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First of all, as I've said before, God's timing is perfect, even when you don't realize it at the time. Today was a great example of that. I had committed to coming to help the KW City View Team plant this garden, and I had looked forward to it all week. They also were doing a clean up and painting service project at Woodlawn Theater today, and I said that I would swing by there once the garden was in, even if it was just for a few minutes. As you know, Rowan LOVED being at Woodlawn. He was in 6 shows there, and 3 at NESA.</div>
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When I woke up this morning, I felt terrible. I did not know how I was going to make it to San Antonio to help. I took Ian to school, laid back down and fell asleep, after telling sweet Margie that I didn't know if I would make it after all. She gently urged me to at least come for a little bit if at all possible. Around 11 I felt Rowan encouraging me to get out of bed and go help them. I knew how we would have definitely been there if he were still here on Earth...he just had that way about him...nothing stopped him. So I decided to go ahead and text Margie and head in.</div>
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I am so grateful that I did. </div>
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This year the garden was designed for a very special group of Mom's, and their children. It was planted at a transitional home for families who have left dangerous situations for a fresh start. They asked me what they should call it, once it was complete, and I said "The garden of Hope". It not only honors Rowan's memory, it is a perfect message for these ladies and their children too.</div>
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Keller Williams outdid themselves once again, making a nature trail for the children, flag stone paths between the homes, and a wonderfully planned peaceful garden in the middle. In true Rowan fashion, there were butterfly garden stones, metal butterfly art, brightly colored wind chimes, a bench, and gorgeous native plants and flowers. <i>(*For privacy purposes, I did not take photos of the grounds.)</i></div>
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Margie asked me to speak to the group of volunteers, so I told them a little about Rowan, his experience as a red Day Foreman and how happy he would be to see them continuing to "Make the Good". As I started digging a hole for one of the plants, Margie suddenly yelled, "Carrie, get over here!" I ran to her, knowing that it must be some sort of sign from Rowan...which of course it was. </div>
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A beautiful orange butterfly, fluttering all around us... landing this close to my foot. </div>
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She said she had prayed that Rowan would be with us all today...and he was. Thank you Rowan!</div>
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At the end of the planting, installation and clean up, everyone gathered around the garden and they did the sweetest thing...they all blew bubbles in Rowan's memory. </div>
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It's like he and all of his angel friends were dancing around the garden...it was so beautiful, it brought me to tears.</div>
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I only had about an hour left before I had to head back to New Braunfels, so I rushed over to Woodlawn with some of the KW group, to check in on the progress that the other KW team was making there. Now, as I've mentioned, Woodlawn Theater was one of Rowan's favorite places to spend time outside of the hospital. I took him every Tuesday night for 3+ hours, for at least 3 years. He said he felt "like a normal kid" when he was there. It wasn't uncommon for him to have a bone marrow biopsy, or pass a kidney stone, but still make it to rehearsal the same night...sometimes reciting his lines for his doctors, begging them to let him out so he didn't miss dress rehearsal or a show. He spent 8 hours at the infusion clinic prior to practice almost every single time. He was always determined to be the first one "off-book". He put his jazz pants and dance shoes on hours before it was time to go to practice. And even from the emergency room or hospital, he was the epitome of "the show must go on"!</div>
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Walking in there today was difficult. They gave me a tour to show me all the areas they had cleaned, painted, remodeled, etc. I spent so much time in those rooms with Rowan, it was a bit overwhelming to be back there without him. When we went into the kids dance studio, where they had choreographed and practiced all of their numbers...I started to cry once again. </div>
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It was just so empty, so quiet...</div>
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not how I remembered it over 100 times before, when it had been full of kids, full of noise, full of life.</div>
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I told Chris Rodriguez (Rowan's Choreographer and Youth Director, now the Executive Director/Artistic Director) that I believed, if Rowan could come back to Earth for just one more day, he would probably either go Big-footing, or he would be back on that stage performing in front of all of his family, friends and fans:) I mean that too. He LOVED acting, he LOVED Chris, and he LOVED the Woodlawn.</div>
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Before I had to leave, they asked everyone to come in to the main stage theater. </div>
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All of the Keller Williams Red Day volunteers, and Chris, went up on the stage. The curtains were shut, which is not unusual when a show is not going on, so I had no idea what was about to happen. </div>
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Sweet Maggie (KW Realtor and fellow stage Mom...<i>love you Lilly Grace!</i>) started to explain about why the Woodlawn was important to Rowan, and why that made it important to KW too. Then, they had a sweet young couple come up and start talking. I had no idea what was going on, until the curtains were pulled back and they unveiled a mural they had done of Rowan, that will now hang in the Woodlawn. </div>
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Chris said that every child that walks through their doors to be a part of their youth program (over 800 a year) will know about Rowan, and that his memory will live on at the Woodlawn forever. I literally fell down. I'm not kidding. My knees buckled, and I fell to the ground, bawling crying. My sweet boy's image will grace that theater that he loved so very, very, much...where he felt like a "normal kid". I was completely taken aback. I did not see it coming. It was such a sweet tribute to my boy, such an honor.</div>
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Once I recovered (meaning, once they picked me up off the floor), I was able to go on stage and thank Margie, Maggie, Chris, all the KW Red Day volunteers and especially the Lopez's, for capturing Rowan's spirit in their artwork.</div>
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There were so many messages today. So many signs. So much Rowan in the air.</div>
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Keller Williams City View... Thank you for giving where you live. Thank you for making the good. Thank you for continuing to honor Rowan's memory.</div>
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Chris Rodriguez and the entire Woodlawn Theater staff... Thank you for giving Rowan more than some normalcy, you gave him confidence, you gave him a dream, you gave him a stage. Knowing he touched you all too, means the world to me. </div>
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Thank you for not forgetting our little actor... Rowan...</div>
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Thank you for not forgetting...</div>
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<b> "The Turkey"</b> (Honk Jr.), </div>
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<b>"Bun Foo"</b> (Thoroughly Modern Millie Jr.), </div>
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<b>"Prince #3: The Prince Formerly Known as the Artist"</b> Aladdin Jr.), </div>
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<b>"Peter Pan"</b> (Shrek Jr.), </div>
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<b>"Michael Darling"</b> (Peter Pan Jr.), </div>
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<b>"Mr. Pinky"</b> (Hairspray).</div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><i>If all the world is a stage, </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><i>can you imagine what Heaven is like </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><i>with Rowan up there?</i></span></div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-24611808352977086452018-05-08T12:41:00.003-07:002018-05-08T20:24:24.607-07:00Fighting Hunger in Memory of Rowan...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: black;">It's that time of year again...time to start collecting cereal for the youth in San Antonio and the surrounding area. As many of you know, Methodist Children's Hospital has collected cereal for the San Antonio Food Bank for years. every Summer, to help with their Million Summer Meals Program. There are so many children who count on the breakfast and lunch they receive at school, during the school year, as their main source of nutrition. In the Summer months, when they are out of school, some go hungry without that guarantee of food. Several years ago, while hospitalized for another very long stay at Methodist Children's Hospital, Rowan asked all his visitors to bring him a box of cereal for the food drive, instead of a toy or gift for him. What happened next was nothing short of a miracle... he collected 1000s of servings of cereal, from his hospital bed. He personally collected more than most of the pediatric units in the hospital. It was amazing...and it didn't stop there. The next 2 years, he collected cereal outside the hospital and his totals grew each Summer. Last year, following his death, they renamed the cereal drive, the "Rowan Windham Memorial Cereal Drive". They were able to collect over 130,000 servings last Summer, and children all over Southwest Texas, had food for their bellies each morning.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black;">This year, the hospital is again hosting this drive, and collecting cereal June 1-8th, 2018. There are several ways you can support this effort in Rowan's Memory once again:</span></div>
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<li><span style="color: black;">Starting tomorrow, May 9th, I will have cereal collection boxes at several local businesses. You can drop off your cereal all the way up to June 6th at any one of these locations, and I will deliver them to the hospital myself. Thank you so much to each of these groups for your hearts to keep Rowan's legacy alive, and your willingness to open your businesses as cereal collection stations. And, for everyone reading this...I highly recommend you try out both restaurants or go see a show at Woodlawn Theater. These are some of Rowan's favorite people and were some of Rowan's favorite places to be in the world.</span></li>
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<li><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Copa Wine Bar</u></b> in Stone Oak: 19141 Stone Oak Parkway, SA, TX 78258</span></span></li>
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<li><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Poke Planet</u></b> in the Medical Center: 7302 Louis Pasteur Drive Suite 103, SA, TX 78229</span></span></li>
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<li><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Woodlawn Theater</u></b> in the Deco District: 1920 Fredericksburg Road, SA, TX 78201</span></span></li>
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<b><u><span style="font-size: large;">Comal Drug</span></u></b><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 24px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"> in New Braunfels: 544 North Union Avenue, NB, TX 78130</span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"></span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />
<ul>
<li><span style="color: black;">You can also deliver your cereal to the hospital itself during the week of June 1st through 8th. Please just have it there by June 7th so they can tally it all before their presentation on the 8th.</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="color: black;"></span><br />
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<li><span style="color: black;">I will come meet you if you, or your work, or church, or any other group would like to collect cereal together. Message me here or on Facebook and we can set up a time for me to come pick up your cereal. Again, I would need to do so by June 6th.</span></li>
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<span style="color: black;"></span><br />
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<li><span style="color: black;">If you are not local but would like to participate you can either mail me your cereal, or make a Paypal or check donation and I will take care of it for you. <span style="background-color: transparent; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Message me here or on Facebook and I will provide you with the address or my Paypal address.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="background-color: transparent; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="color: black;"></span><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Last Year, Rowan was named Hunger Fighter of the Year for Food provided to the Food Bank, through this cereal drive. I accepted the honor on his behalf, but I know he was looking down from heaven, and so very proud of that. I hope we blow last years totals out of the water, and make his light shine even brighter! Their goal this year is 150,000 servings. I believe we can do that!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="color: black;"></span><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Rowan had many passions, and goals. Helping make sure no child goes hungry was one of the biggest. Thank you for helping us, help Methodist Children's Hospital, help the SA Food Bank, help reach that goal. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="color: black;"></span><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;">F<span style="background-color: transparent; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">or a kid who couldn't even eat cereal, who collected cereal for other children, from a hospital bed... </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Let's do this!</span><br />
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-53310380099822322852018-04-16T19:19:00.003-07:002018-04-16T19:20:55.063-07:00Pulitzer Prize 2018 Finalist- Feature Photography!!!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhk9eEPBm_0p4gjl7cxGjzNHVlNFjEVJfVFtNb5SkzxEOoECw-ze9kSV-tlfsuxGDlN40CUuSYO0T8HQ67mgAJJXjxh4X_R19-R3uop73zeZrinmF_tm9Thu3xu17cd25raJLguW-jL6qg/s1600/IMG_1017.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="453" data-original-width="635" height="228" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhk9eEPBm_0p4gjl7cxGjzNHVlNFjEVJfVFtNb5SkzxEOoECw-ze9kSV-tlfsuxGDlN40CUuSYO0T8HQ67mgAJJXjxh4X_R19-R3uop73zeZrinmF_tm9Thu3xu17cd25raJLguW-jL6qg/s320/IMG_1017.PNG" width="320" /></a></div>
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I was invited to come to San Antonio today, to be at the SA Express News offices when the 2018 Pulitzer Prize Awards were announced livestream. "Rowan's Reach" by photojournalist Lisa Krantz had been submitted in the Featured News Category. With such a big news year, and so many global stories, tragedies and crises, we did not expect to be in the running. However, Lisa's work was announced as a Pulitzer Prize Finalist! (one of just 3 in it's category) This is HUGE!. This is only the second SA Express News submission that has made it as a Pulitzer finalist, in over 100 years. And Rowan was the only entry this year whose story featured a specific individual, not a group or an event. For a single child's life, death and legacy to reach such a broad audience and for Lisa's photos of him to be recognized at this level...is mind blowing.</div>
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We awaited the news together... </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxw3j0I-qr2XC74NB3M5JEimkSmYNw1K-ECKAQJj0i_moGH7QG2Arzm5_PVD5wrQSSUBNqCJKTfmPLYDSxZWlWDGpDeRaJ2hh_Hewm0a2jLUUZEFJP8vATku8jVvTcmcA6Trmy0Wgj09o/s1600/IMG_1014.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="1136" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxw3j0I-qr2XC74NB3M5JEimkSmYNw1K-ECKAQJj0i_moGH7QG2Arzm5_PVD5wrQSSUBNqCJKTfmPLYDSxZWlWDGpDeRaJ2hh_Hewm0a2jLUUZEFJP8vATku8jVvTcmcA6Trmy0Wgj09o/s400/IMG_1014.PNG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4WCDXkzCPFQ4xYYisIaED47FSjyodm59v-hL8vhnMLE4novptrACcwQNHkXuVjMiP9EhjwFd6zMsTPUwJQqi0nDPx0z3dg6lAdemIMWEzfudAQLaOLWT-bUB9JFqt6UMNyF_FRoT18ZU/s1600/IMG_0981.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4WCDXkzCPFQ4xYYisIaED47FSjyodm59v-hL8vhnMLE4novptrACcwQNHkXuVjMiP9EhjwFd6zMsTPUwJQqi0nDPx0z3dg6lAdemIMWEzfudAQLaOLWT-bUB9JFqt6UMNyF_FRoT18ZU/s400/IMG_0981.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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And were thrilled to hear he was a finalist...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDY9BheBe8XBAA98nKPjXI-WsH8I4RvhEEJwKx2L587u8tvGELhaQ6L3TDInDFhm77L7V5gM3jo0d15k7saJgKML9y1B37_7wjB1ZM31VCjsRnzkzSLlyKRbKFXOx4Sg69Mvy_A4sJEM0/s1600/IMG_0984.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDY9BheBe8XBAA98nKPjXI-WsH8I4RvhEEJwKx2L587u8tvGELhaQ6L3TDInDFhm77L7V5gM3jo0d15k7saJgKML9y1B37_7wjB1ZM31VCjsRnzkzSLlyKRbKFXOx4Sg69Mvy_A4sJEM0/s400/IMG_0984.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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At the celebration, a few hours after the announcement was made public, I told the entire news room, that Rowan always wanted to save the world. The first time he told us that when he was 3 years old, in ICU, after his first brain surgery. I explained that while he definitely changed a lot of us, the work Lisa, and all of them, did on this story, and with the countless other stories they bring to the masses, they were helping Rowan achieve that goal. It takes a village, and they were all indeed changing if not helping him save the world.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHblNDUJy2GkI1d06n6ualnqnboLF4qtkb-TyYhjQb_c6YaQydUhjAkEzwQsTSg0cEmKYJx8SWd8MJ7C2gNjp0izv-PVQqMVZ_umTVfnxRWhwzp4is3Ji0L4RfkdDQE-spoSzU0rIiKk4/s1600/IMG_1011.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="743" data-original-width="1600" height="296" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHblNDUJy2GkI1d06n6ualnqnboLF4qtkb-TyYhjQb_c6YaQydUhjAkEzwQsTSg0cEmKYJx8SWd8MJ7C2gNjp0izv-PVQqMVZ_umTVfnxRWhwzp4is3Ji0L4RfkdDQE-spoSzU0rIiKk4/s640/IMG_1011.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQCfvIoufddNLn9HD3Deosyw6eIudoA1vEjp8M-jUWPBuEe4Yw3ts1dNnqkyFrl1VQKpxNZ8tM2ySk8ZVu6rS_ArsDao6C6Gi91iNp7F6oPsVB62U2KqMFcA_Ixa7m7i40TeDn8Ltsp1g/s1600/IMG_1016.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQCfvIoufddNLn9HD3Deosyw6eIudoA1vEjp8M-jUWPBuEe4Yw3ts1dNnqkyFrl1VQKpxNZ8tM2ySk8ZVu6rS_ArsDao6C6Gi91iNp7F6oPsVB62U2KqMFcA_Ixa7m7i40TeDn8Ltsp1g/s400/IMG_1016.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I cannot thank Lisa Krantz (photographer), the Editor in Chief, the Managing Editor, Text editor, Photo editor, and the entire staff of the San Antonio Express News for all your hard work. Rowan is no doubt smiling down, proud of how far reaching his message of hope is spreading, excited about how many people will hopefully now remember to "Love your Life!".</div>
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For the rest of time, if someone looks up the 2018 Pulitzer Prize Awards Finalist at <a href="http://www.pulitzer.org/prize-winners-by-year">http://www.pulitzer.org/prize-winners-by-year</a> they will see Lisa's touching photos of Rowan's life and legacy, in the 2018 Featured News category finalists. That is a big deal, a really big deal!</div>
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Here are just a few of them...</div>
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As the Pulitzer Prize Board describes the photos and story, which also perfectly describes Rowan's life, it was a "... physical, spiritual and emotional journey".</div>
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Congratulations Lisa and the San Antonio Express-News.</div>
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Thank you for truly expanding Rowan's reach...</div>
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And remember everyone... "Love Your Life!"</div>
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<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-46950315112410608622018-04-16T07:50:00.000-07:002018-04-16T08:03:09.332-07:00Guardians of the Children remember "Hope" & "Courage" once again as they give back to the community.<div style="text-align: center;">
The Guardians of the Children Von Ormy Chapter hosted the 10th Annual Children's Festival "Avenida Fiesta" this Saturday, and gave away bikes to kids in the community, once again. You may remember Rowan attending 2 years ago and bringing an Iron Man bike that he was so very proud to donate to a precious little boy. Last year they honored Rowan's memory by putting his bracelets on the bikes, and this year they did that and more...</div>
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The Guardian's of the Children do so much for the community. They not only stand up for and protect neglected and abused children in the community, and give back to the under served, but they also adopted Rowan and Jalene into their family as <span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Lil' Guardians, as</span> they fought for their lives. Jalene was known as "Courage" and Rowan chose the name "Hope". They wore their vests proudly and embodied those characteristics, and both of our families cherish the vests, and what they mean, still to this day. </div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline; float: none; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">It was such a beautiful day Saturday... both the weather and the spirit and heart of the event. They opened by presenting the flags and playing the national anthem. They had face painters, clowns, balloon animals, games, food, drinks, music, dancing, etc... all free to the local children and their families.</span></div>
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The biggest part of the festival though is the free bike raffle for the kids. They give away tons of bikes to kids of all ages. </div>
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Rowan's bracelets were on the handle bars once again. </div>
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It is just precious to watch the kids run up to the stage when their name is called, and they get to choose from a sea of brand new shiny bicycles...truly priceless. </div>
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It makes me cry every year. Jen and I donated a Frozen bike in memory of Jalene, and an awesome orange trick bike in memory of Rowan, this year. It was so fun to wait and see who chose those specific bikes. They were so excited! Their parents allowed me to photograph them on them, which really warmed our hearts.</div>
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Before the bike raffle started though, the Guardian's called Jen and I, and Jalene's sister Zoe, up on stage, and honored our angels so beautifully. </div>
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They told a little bit about Jalene and Rowan and explained how they had been adopted into their family as "Courage" & "Hope". Then they held a moment of silence, a balloon release (letting all the children there let go of their brightly colored balloons at the end of the moment of silence), and played "Shake it Off" for Jalene, and "Somewhere over the Rainbow" for Rowan. Jen and I both held each other and cried.</div>
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Near the end of the songs we noticed the last straggling balloons, the only ones left that could be seen at that point... they were a single orange balloon and a single purple balloon <i>(I didn't get a picture of it, but we all saw it;)</i>. A sign of thanks from "Courage" & "Hope".</div>
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Thank you to our Guardian's of the Children Von Ormy Family and to every other sponsor, volunteer, and attendee who helped make Saturday so special. We love you, love attending this event, donating bikes, and watching all the good you are making in the community.</div>
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And thank you for always remembering and honoring our angels, Rowan Jameson "Hope" Windham & Jalene Estella "Courage" Salinas...</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-58918549521315751482018-04-14T17:16:00.000-07:002018-04-14T18:05:34.943-07:00"Rowan's Reach" has become almost unreal... congratulations Lisa Krantz!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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We knew that Lisa Krantz was a talented photographer and special lady from the first time we met her, in 2015 when she was assigned by the San Antonio Express News to photograph Rowan's Honorary induction into the Texas National Guard at Camp Mabry in Austin. Shortly after that she started following his story online and eventually began what would become a 2 year photo journalism project: "Rowan's Reach". Lisa took pictures of the good and the bad... from soccer games to emergency room trips, play practice to transplant, looking for Bigfoot to in a coma, from eating French fries to his funeral. Lisa was there for so much of Rowan's last two years of life, and even after he went to Heaven, both in Texas and in Seattle, she became like family. </div>
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"Rowan's Reach" was published on the front page of the San Antonio Express News this past Thanksgiving weekend, just 3 weeks before the one year anniversary of his death. It was a work of art, a true expression of his life, death, and ongoing legacy. We were very pleased with the piece, and so proud of her. Lisa's hard work, dedication, and her heart were evident in the story and photos that covered 5 full pages of the paper that Sunday. But what was to come, we could not have predicted. We knew she was good, but we didn't realize she was this good.</div>
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The following is a list of the awards and recognition she has already received for her work with Rowan, either from the entire "Rowan's Reach" newspaper article and photos, for individual photos she took of Rowan during this process, or for her online video footage and slideshow of Rowan. She is truly remarkable, and deserves every accolade she has earned. </div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"><u>➧Winner Photojournalism Award-American Society of News Editors Awards 2018</u></span></b></div>
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<b style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><u>➧Finalist in their prestigious annual award (and edited version of "Rowan's Reach" featured in their March 2018 edition)-"Days Japan" Magazine</u></span></b></div>
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...and perhaps the most exciting recognition...</div>
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<b style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><u>➧Submitted by SA Express-News for 2018 Pulitzer Prize Award Consideration</u></span></b></div>
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"Rowan's Reach" was submitted for consideration for the 102nd class of Pulitzer prize awards. These were voted on this past Thursday and Friday, and the announcement of the winners will be made Monday, April 16th, at 3:00 pm Eastern Standard Time. Now, this one is obviously a long-shot. Not because Lisa is not talented or worthy, but there is some very tough competition and will more than likely be a more global or political submission, given the events of the past year. But, to even be submitted for a Pulitzer Prize is huge! We are so proud of Lisa, and of Rowan for having such an amazing life and legacy. They are changing the world. As Lisa told me, just the fact that it is even a submission, is allowing his story to circulate even more. Journalists all over the world are reading his story, and sharing it with others. Lisa and Rowan were even mentioned in an article online at Poynter.org, that explains the Pulitzer Prize process. So exciting. </div>
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"Rowan's Reach" has been unreal! Thank you for helping tell his story Lisa, and for spreading it not just throughout Texas, but all over the United States and even the world. Rowan is definitely smiling down on you from Heaven, with his arms outstretched!</div>
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What you may not know Lisa is that I took a few pictures of you with Rowan myself. He saw you as part of his family too...</div>
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Cheers to you Lisa Krantz, on your huge success with "Rowan's Reach". Here we were, the 3 of us, toasting on a plane to Seattle... toasting to his chance at being healed...toasting to loving our lives...</div>
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Cheers,</div>
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Rowan.</div>
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<br />Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-39466602441723610952018-04-06T10:37:00.000-07:002018-04-06T10:37:00.433-07:00Little boys should not have to play on their friends graves, but I am blessed that he did...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikUBRe9TZS8hBS7mIJtn9gPzFp-Gs-fLoJIm1srIEFN1UCL0f3hvj83Qj_3tAUNXS6tdCyg40-9qiEfR2NkZW-AaE09ZHVuiNXTXqHJiq8YNWwNq9RQ576RLu0SBOVotKl07-HuKHhtVo/s1600/IMG_0730.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikUBRe9TZS8hBS7mIJtn9gPzFp-Gs-fLoJIm1srIEFN1UCL0f3hvj83Qj_3tAUNXS6tdCyg40-9qiEfR2NkZW-AaE09ZHVuiNXTXqHJiq8YNWwNq9RQ576RLu0SBOVotKl07-HuKHhtVo/s400/IMG_0730.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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Rowan's SDS buddy Roman, is just 3 1/2 years old. He loves trucks of all kinds...and I mean LOVES trucks. He carries them around in his backpack, in search of any dirt pile he can find. He has excavators, front end loaders, back hoes, dump trucks, you name it.</div>
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Yesterday, since Roman and his family were in town, we met for breakfast and then went out to the cemetery to visit Rowan's grave together. It's always bittersweet being out there with others. I am blessed that they haven't forgotten my beautiful angel, but it makes me wish he was there with us physically too.</div>
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We laid out blankets, around Rowan's gravesite, and started chatting. </div>
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Roman laid the gorgeous orange flowers his Mom had brought on Rowan's grave and I helped him arrange them there with the sunflowers I had brought. </div>
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Within minutes Roman pulled out his "diggers" and started playing in the dirt covering Rowan's grave. His parents of course immediately tried to stop him, and redirect him. It made me tear up, but I told them, "it's ok, let him play, Rowan would want him to". Roman's Mom and I agreed that Rowan was probably laughing down from heaven. </div>
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It was breathtakingly shocking and beautiful at the same time, watching a beautiful little boy playing on his friend's grave. I took multiple pictures of that moment though, because it was so special. </div>
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As you know, Rowan dreamed of playing tag in heaven with his friends who passed before him. He visited their graves often. It brought him joy. Roman was experiencing some of that joy too. He was able to play there, not sit and cry. Now I realize he is young, and playing is what 3 year olds do...but trust me when I say, it was a beautiful, precious, priceless, poignant moment...and it will shape who he becomes as he grows up.</div>
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Kenny, our new friend from Amazon who we surprised the day before, joined us out at the cemetery too. </div>
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It was his first time visiting Rowan. His presence brought even more peace and love to the gathering. We all sat there for a couple hours, telling Rowan stories and watching Roman play. </div>
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As if the day weren't beautiful enough, Nicole, Roman's Mom noticed a white fluffy dandelion near Rowan's grave. </div>
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There weren't any others that we could see anywhere! All the rest were still fresh and yellow. <span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; color: black; display: inline !important; float: none; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;"> It was a sign from Rowan. </span> Remember, Rowan wished on a dandelion the first day he met Roman, he wished that he and all his other friends would be healed. Nicole picked the dandelion and we all taught Roman how to blow a dandelion into the wind. </div>
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Another priceless moment.</div>
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Thank you Kenny, Nicole, Peter, Roman...and Rowan, for a day I'll always remember and for your friendship that I know will never end.</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359668031616272663.post-4789823281767342792018-04-05T19:46:00.002-07:002018-04-05T19:46:37.648-07:00 From missing keys to found friends...EVERYTHING happens for a reason!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hopefully, by now, most of you all have heard the story of how an Amazon worker from San Marcos accidentally dropped his lanyard and keys in a package a few months ago and it got shipped to our dear friend's in Houston. </div>
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Roman (their son) and our Rowan were SDS buddies ("The Texas Roros"). We met online in a FB Forum, started messaging and texting for over a year, and then finally met in person just before we left for transplant. Then, Roman and his parents came to visit Rowan in Seattle the day before he moved to ICU and fell into the coma. </div>
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Long story short, Nicole and Peter got the keys back to Kenny from Amazon, after finding him on Facebook. This led to him looking at their Facebook page too, and learning about Roman not having a bone marrow match yet (just like Rowan didn't). Kenny has now made it his mission to make the good out of that crazy (or not so crazy) situation. He has become a huge bone marrow registry advocate, searching for Roman's match, and trying to live by Rowan's words at the same time: "If you can't see the good, make the good!". And believe me, Kenny is making some tremendous good! There has been a 3 day bone marrow swab event going on at the San Marcos Amazon Fulfillment Center because of this young man.</div>
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Yesterday, the Shen Family and I met there in San Marcos at Amazon, as Kenny arrived for work, to surprise him. It was the first time that he had met any of us. It was a surprise for him...but boy were the tears flowing from all of us. </div>
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I brought a gift for Kenny...one of Rowan's bracelets, his memorial cards, one of his cross necklaces, and one of his t-shirts. He was very moved.</div>
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I brought a gift for Roman, Rowan's little buddy, as well...</div>
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I gave Roman, Rowan's bike, helmet, bike gloves and pads, along with a picture of Rowan riding the bike, before he left for Seattle for his transplants. </div>
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It is so difficult to give your child's precious possessions away after they pass, but I just knew that Rowan would want Roman to have it. I told his Mom, "I fully expect him to grow into this bike, and for you to send me a picture of him riding it down the street one day, just like Rowan."</div>
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What a precious day yesterday was. Gencure/Be the Match swabbed lots of employees as Kenny continues to do God's work. We met an angel on Earth in Kenny. He got to meet little Roman. Tears were shed. Lots of laughter too though. Gifts were given...but the greatest gift of all is the potential life saving matches that may have been signing up yesterday...</div>
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...and all of this because Kenny accidentally dropped his keys inside an Amazon package at work one day. Nicole said she chooses to believe Rowan had something to do with that, since Kenny and I don't live far from one another. She thinks Rowan helped them fall into that box, knowing it was headed to Roman, knowing she would return them, knowing he would become an amazing advocate...and hopefully Rowan's wish on the dandelion, of finding his friend's cure will come true because of all this.</div>
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Thank you Kenny.</div>
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Thank you Amazon San Marcos for allowing this event at your center.</div>
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Thank you Gencure/Be the Match for hosting it.</div>
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Thank you Shen's for inviting me to be there for the surprise.</div>
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Thank you to everyone who swabbed.</div>
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Thank you Jesus!</div>
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Carrie Windhamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13359851998139273775noreply@blogger.com1